It worked at half-time against West Ham but maybe he needs to have them before the game.
A shedload of winners but Liverpool were the most impressive. And Man United have momentum.
Paul Pogba is really starting to hit his stride, while Pep might have to smell Stan Collymore's cheese.
Mark Noble missed his penalty but scored the rebound as the Hammers move out of the drop zone.
A brilliant 60 seconds, Pep is a massive fraud again, and a non-Garth Crooks Team of the Week.
Thirty-one players are still yet to even be named on a Premier League bench for a game this season...
On Liverpool without Coutinho, Pep Guardiola, Antonio Conte, Chelsea's defence and Jose Mourinho...
We thought they'd be brilliant; now we feel short-changed. Alli, Martial, Mahrez and Xhaka feature...
Burnley boss Sean Dyche believes diving could be stamped out within six months.
George Boyd grabs winner in entertaining clash at Turf Moor.
Which players have played fewer PL minutes this season in comparison to last? One per club...
Watch the goals flow at Old Trafford. Cheeky Punt is also expecting Alan Pardew to go full David Brent.
Goal music is hated, but if we don't let it bring the terraces together in love, love will tear us apart again.
West Ham v Man City sounds good but you know Preston v Arsenal screams telly.
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