Degsy desperately needs to pay off his mobile phone debt, so he's lumping on Falcao to open his account with the first goal at Old Trafford on Sunday...
Degsy's is back in sparkling form after his sister's A Levels results. He fancies Chelsea at odds against and Aaron Ramsey to keep his goalscoring touch...
Crystal Palace v Aston Villa
Villa have not won in their last five away games (losing three) while Palace have posted back-to-back wins over Chelsea and Cardiff. Tony Pulis' side are on the brink of an amazing escape and look a solid call here at odds-against.
Betting: Crystal Palace to win at 23/20 (Hills/Ladbrokes)
Fulham v Norwich City
I'll level with you: I had an awful weekend last weekend. My Grand National hope Big Schu fell without ever threatening and a lad sh*t himself in my car. On purpose. The only bright spot was napping Fulham at 3s to win at Villa and I fancy them to continue their mini-revival by beating a Norwich side without an away win since December.
Betting: Fulham to win at 23/20 (Ladbrokes/Paddy Power)
Southampton v Cardiff City
The game looks more or less up for Cardiff who are staring relegation in the face and look set for a bit of a pasting here against a Saints side who have scored 11 goals in four games. Hills go 11/10 that the Saints score in both halves and that looks a lock on recent evidence.
Betting: Southampton to score in both halves at 11/10 (Hills)
Stoke v Newcastle
Played 3. Scored 0. Conceded 11. As Del Boy was often fond of saying 'what can't speak, can't lie' and the Mags have been awful in recent weeks. Safe from the travails of a relegation dogfight but without the necessary points to launch a European challenge, I wonder how many Toon players are already mentally on the beach? Stoke, who have lost just once at home in 2014, look genuine mortgage jobs.
Betting: Stoke (-1) to win at 100/30 (Paddy Power)
Sunderland v Everton
The Black Cats have won their last two against Everton but they have been absolutely f*cking bobbins of late and I can't have them here, even at 4/1. A Champions League place is now in Everton's hands and they will surely be revved up for this. I am getting more excited by Ross Barkley with every passing week. In fact I have not been this excited by a 20-year-old since my mate's sister let me finger her in a tent in Osmotherley back in 1992.
Betting: Barclay to score first at 8/1 (Paddy Power)
West Brom v Tottenham
If Tim Sherwood doesn't get the Spurs gig next season, and Alan Pardew leaves Newcastle, maybe they can fight each other to the death in a huge PPV attraction? Sherwood's macho, über-aggressive shtick doesn't fool me for a minute. Remember Timothy, I knew you when you had that flouncy sh*t curtains hairdo in the days when you regularly used to bottle 50-50 challenges with Roy Keane. I digress. The Baggies have drawn five out of six home games under Pepe Mel so the smart money here is on a draw.
Betting: West Brom and Tottenham to draw 1-1 at 13/2 (Bet Victor)
Liverpool v Man City
Can the Reds claim their first title win since 1990, a full two years after the club released their seminal track The Anfield Rap? It's certainly now in their hands and I'm sure plenty of neutrals would like to see them do it given their attacking brand of football that's been wowing crowds up and town the land this term. City have too much quality to be dismissed lightly here but I do think there will be goals (these two have 174 between them in the league this season).
Betting: Over 3.5 goals at 7/5 (Ladbrokes)
Swansea v Chelsea
The Blues will still be buzzing following their Herculean Champions League effort against PSG in the week. It was an unbelievable night but rest assured Don Jose will have his troops ready for this. John Terry and Gary Cahill have been different gear for Chelsea all season and if England are serious about actually getting out of their group at the World Cup this summer they simply have to swallow their pride and send out an SOS to Terry. He can help marshal the Blues to another clean sheet on Sunday as Chelsea keep the pressure on at the top.
Betting: Chelsea to win to nil at 2/1 (Sky Bet)
Wigan v Arsenal
This is a huge game for Arsenal, who have not won a trophy for precisely eight years, 10 months and 21 days. Beleaguered boss Arsene Wenger knows he has to deliver silverware this season, particularly given how their title challenge has faltered. Wigan won't be a pushover but I reckon two's on quotes about a Gooners win looks about right and I fancy Aaron Ramsey, who looks a cert to start following his return from injury, to get back among the goals.
Betting: Ramsey to score anytime at 21/10 (Paddy Power)
Hull v Sheffield United
It's been a fairytale run for the Blades but surely it all comes to an end on Sunday. Hull fans have been celebrating already this week after news their owner won't be able to officially change their name to Hull Tigers and I reckon their team can cap a dream week by putting lowly Sheff Utd to the sword here to book a first ever FA Cup final appearance.
Betting: Hull (-1) to beat Sheffield United at 2/1 (Sky Bet)