It's a sad thing to say, but Scholesy suffers from just being a bit plain, from not having the analysis of Neville or anger of Keane. He is Lowry's idea of a pundit...
With the stampede for Jurgen Klopp in full flow - how much do you remember about foreign managers in the Premier League?
And so, Euro 2012 is over, there's no football left to watch so the only things to distract you are hope, transfer rumours and schadenfreude. The first one we can't help you with, the second there's plenty of elsewhere on F365, so on with the third - it's time to have a look at our pre-tournament predictions and laugh at our idiocy.
First thing's first - the winners. Tim Stannard and Rob McNichol both showed staggeringly little imagination, but what they lack in inspiration they make up for in accuracy, for they both picked Spain to win. Nick Miller and Philip Cornwall thought a little further outside the box in selecting France and Holland respectively, but there's a reason why these things are outside the box - they're often utter bollocks. Everyone else picked Germany, which you can't really laugh too hard at.
As for the runners-up, John Nicholson and Alan Tyers repeated the mistakes of Miller and Cornwall by picking France and Holland, so a gentle slap on the wrist for them.
A rather more aggressive clip round the ear for Miller, Nicholson, Stannard and Sarah Winterburn, who all foretold Karim Benzema for the Golden Boot. His failure to find the net will leave that quartet boycotting brie and naming their chipped potatoes 'Freedom Fries' in protest. Nobody selected eventual winner Fernando Torres, but a small amount of kudos goes to Daniel Storey for tipping Mario Gomez, who of course bagged as many goals as Torres, but in more minutes.
In terms of England's prospects, Winterburn was the bobbest on, foretelling an easy progression from the groups and narrow defeat in the quarter-finals, while Matt Stanger and McNichol both vaguely suggested a similar exit time. Everyone else had doom in their hearts, predicting out at the first hurdle. It's a cheery place, F365 Towers.
Stannard again did well in the 'Which big boys will flop' question, correctly predicting an early exit for Holland, while Miller made the (in hindsight) relatively ludicrous suggestion that 'Either Croatia or Ireland could nip in ahead of Italy in that group.' Not so much. The stinkiest prediction of this section surely came from Winterburn, who asked if eventual finalists Italy could still be counted as big boys. Oops.
The 'pick a surprise package' is more of a difficult one to pin down, but a lovely bacon sandwich is awarded to Cornwall, who said 'The referees will get credit rather than blame for a change', and McNichol, who said Greece would qualify. However, a less lovely sh*t sarnie goes to Miller for saying Holland would play lovely attacking football, Stanger for saying Russia would finish top of their group and more or less everyone for predicting one-goal Robert Lewandowski would wow us all.
Perhaps we should give up this predictions lark. People might start thinking we don't know what we're talking about...
To read the full set of predictions, click here.