The boys try and take a look at Alan Irvine's appearances on TV but keep dropping off. Never before has a man been too dull to even use cliches. It's not good...
* Arsenal have hit the target with only 27 of their 102 shots so far this season. In contrast, Chelsea have hit the target with 28 of their 86 shots.
* Only Luis Suarez (36), Jermain Defoe (32) and Marouane Fellaini (30) have taken more shots than Santi Cazorla (23) this season but the Spaniard has scored just once.
* Kieran Gibbs made nine tackles and five interceptions v Chelsea on Saturday.
* Aston Villa have won one of their last 16 Premier League games.
* Christian Benteke had six shots v West Brom without hitting the target once.
* Only Leighton Baines has produced more accurate PL crosses than Barry Bannan (17) this season but the Scot played only 19 minutes from the bench v the Baggies.
* Chelsea's 16 points from six games marks their best start since the title-winning season of 2009-10.
* Eden Hazard has been fouled more than any other PL player this season (20).
* Frank Lampard has played 283 minutes of PL football in six matches under RDM this season. He played 405 minutes in the first six matches under AVB last season.
* Everton make a lop-sided 45% of their attacks down the left-hand side.
* Nikica Jelavic has scored 12 goals in just 18 PL appearances for Everton.
* Phil Jagielka reached an Everton teammate with all 34 of his passes v Southampton on Saturday.
* Fulham have drawn only one of their last 21 PL games.
* Dimitar Berbatov has made more chances for Fulham (9) in 2.5 matches than any other Cottagers player all season.
* Defeat to Manchester City ended a run of six PL games unbeaten at home for Fulham.
* Luis Suarez has now scored more PL goals at Carrow Road in 2012 (6) than at Anfield (3).
* No Liverpool player has recorded more than one assist this season but Steven Gerrard has created 18 chances.
* Only Hatem Ben Arfa has completed more dribbles than Luis Suárez (18) this season. He made six dribbles v Norwich on Saturday.
* Man City have allowed the opposition fewer shots (60) than any other PL club this season but have conceded eight goals.
* Only Mikel Arteta has made more passes than Yaya Toure in the PL this season.
* David Silva has been City's more creative player this season - making an average of three chances per game for his teammates.
* Manchester United have averaged the most amount of possession this season (59.7%) but five teams (Everton, Man City, Liverpool, Spurs and Arsenal) have taken more shots.
* Nani attempted 15 crosses v Tottenham on Saturday. None reached a teammate.
* Ryan Giggs came off after 45 minutes v Spurs having completed a grand total of five passes and no accurate crosses.
* Newcastle United
* Demba Ba has scored 22 goals in just 40 PL games for Newcastle.
* Newcastle play more long balls per game (78) than any other PL club.
* Michael Williamson attempted as many clearances as passes (24) v Reading on Saturday.
* Norwich have conceded 13 goals this season. Ten have come in the two games started by Michael Turner rather than Sebastien Bassong.
* No player has created more chances than Robert Snodgrass (13) this season without registering an assist.
* John Ruddy has by far the worst distribution of any PL keeper - only 34% of his passes have reached a teammate this season. The next worst is Asmir Begovic at 47.6%.
* QPR had eight points after six games under Neil Warnock at the start of last season. This season they have two points.
* Adel Taarabt has taken more shots this season (10) than any other QPR player despite playing only 124 minutes of football.
* Park Ji-Sung was substituted after 56 minutes v West Ham after completing just eight passes and no crosses.
* Jimmy Kébé scored a goal with his only shot as a PL player v Newcastle.
* Only Manchester United (31) have attempted more crosses per game than Reading (30) this season.
* Danny Guthrie and Adam Le Fondre are the only Reading players to average an 80% pass completion this season.
* Rickie Lambert has created more chances this season (14) than any of his Saints teammates.
* Maya Yoshida won five aerial duals but was successful with only one of 10 attempted clearances v Everton on Saturday.
* Southampton have conceded more goals (18) than any team after six games since Newcastle United back in 1999. They eventually finished 11th.
* Stoke City
* Michael Kightly has reached a teammate with eight of 23 attempted crosses this season. For comparison, Antonio Valencia has been accurate with five of 31 crosses.
* Peter Crouch has scored four goals from 13 shots this season. Jermain Defoe has scored four goals from 32 shots.
* Stoke have reclaimed the lowest average possession percentage from Sunderland with just 37.5% so far this season.
* Sunderland's five goals this season have come from just seven shots on target.
* Stéphane Sessegnon has attempted only four shots and created five chances in five games.
* Sunderland attempted 30 crosses v Wigan. Adam Johnson attempted six without ever finding a teammate.
* Swansea have not scored in almost five hours of Premier League football.
* Swansea attempted 25 crosses v Stoke but only one reached a teammate.
* Danny Graham has managed one shot on target in his last four PL games for Swansea.
* Gareth Bale recorded a goal and an assist v Man United for the first time since December 2011 v Bolton.
* Jan Vertonghen has made an average of 13 clearances per game for Spurs this season - the highest in the PL.
* Only three of Brad Friedel's 18 attempted passes reached a Tottenham teammate v United.
* Gareth McAuley has won an impressive 16 of 21 aerial duels this season.
* West Brom's 11 points from six games marks their best ever PL start.
* West Brom have not scored a first-half goal since the opening day of the season v Liverpool.
* No player has created more chances than Mark Noble (13) this season without registering an assist.
* West Ham have committed more fouls than any other team this season with an average of 16.2 per game.
* Mohamed Diamé made the most tackles of the weekend with 10 v QPR on Monday night.
* Wigan have lost their last three PL matches. At the same stage last season, they went on a run of eight straight defeats.
* Wigan committed 17 fouls to Sunderland's 22 on Saturday but emerged with five yellow cards and a red. Sunderland got two bookings.
* The Latics are one of three clubs (Sunderland and Fulham are the others) yet to gain a single point from a losing position this season.