50 Ways To Make England v San Marino Fun...

We know you're not looking forward to England v San Marino. Heck, even the players will probably get bored. So here are 50 ways to make watching the match more fun...

Last Updated: 12/10/12 at 09:19 Post Comment

Latest Articles

The Completed Summer Transfers List

19 comments

Here is a full list of summer transfers in 2015. It's getting pretty busy now...

Football People On TV: Mark Lawrenson

33 comments

Like an elderly, grumpy cat that has given up its duties as a family pet and now expects to be able to do exactly as it pleases in its twilight years. It's Mark Lawrenson...

All Articles

1) Hire a petting zoo.

2) Watch the match on a helter skelter.

3) Make someone tickle you for 90 minutes.

4) Watch it while salsa dancing in spandex.

5) Watch it while having fun sex. Not the normal stuff.

6) Remember really fun things while watching the match.

7) Mix loads of different flavours of ice cream.

8) Jump up and down. Naked.

9) Unicycle or swingball. You decide.

10) Draw around your hand then write the names of your five best friends on the fingers and colour it in all nice.

11) Learn how to ride a bike (this may require you forgetting how to ride a bike first).

12) Dress up as a mad professor.

13) Scare an animal.

14) Fireworks (handy for the last suggestion).

15) Chocolate sauce. Be creative.

16) Say everything is 'daft' and laugh until your belly hurts.

17) Draw a treasure map. If the clues lead to your crotch you're a sick pervert.

18) Put Smarties in the holes in your body.

19) Plait your hair.

20) Plait someone else's hair.

21) Eat Werther's Original with your granddad and grin at each other.

22) Change your name by deed poll to Spaghetti Longlegs.

23) Eat lots of baked beans. At least 10 cans. Actually, make it 20 just to be sure.

24) Prank call your relatives and/or colleagues.

25) Go to the shop and buy all the apples. Tell the counter assistant not tell a soul with a look of fear in your eyes, then run out of the store dropping apples as you leave.

26) Dress up in the way you imagine Billy Crystal would like his lover to look.

27) Go on Twitter and pretend that the people you talk to are your real friends.

28) Pillow fight.

29) Try eating a donut without licking your lips.

30) Hopping. Try hopping up the stairs.

31) Dress up like a mermaid.

32) Phone your best friend and tell them you've had a crush on them since the age of seven. Then hang up.

33) Tear the last page out of the book your partner or child is reading.

34) Pretend you're Alan Shearer by eating a plate of chicken and beans and running around the living room with one hand in the air, or two if you're feeling particularly fruity.

35) Smoothies mixed with liquor. I call them Loolies.

36) Eat jam and peanut butter sandwiches and talk with your mouth full.

37) Tweet, text or email ITV endlessly asking if Clive Tyldesley can change his name to Jive Tyldesley.

38) Shout "Give the dog a bone" every time England create a chance. If anyone asks why you keep saying it, ignore them.

39) Inflate a hot air balloon in your living room then fall about on the floor laughing when it all goes horribly wrong.

40) Barbecue. A fairly normal, fun thing to do.

41) Bake a tray of cookies and take them round to the house next door. Say "Howdy neighbour!" as they look you at with a mix of confusion and fear.

42) Make popcorn.

43) Watch the match while climbing a tree. Quite a tricky one.

44) Draw a very unflattering picture of your wife/husband and insist it looks just like them.

45) Suggest doing a 1,000 piece jigsaw puzzle, but eat the last piece before it can be completed.

46) Wear a cape. Never, ever take it off.

47) Act out The History Boys in your living room.

48) Make a robot out of cardboard boxes.

49) Build a rocket ship to take you to Button Moon.

50) Repeatedly claim you do a great Mick Jagger impression until your friends eventually ask you to show them. Then do your best impression of Bruce Forsyth. If they say you're doing Bruce Forsyth, insist it's Mick Jagger until they become annoyed. Then ask what the score is.

Do you have any more suggestions? Put them in the box below...

Matt Stanger - he's on the Twitter.

Football365 Facebook Fan Page

The Football365 fan page is a great place to meet like minded people, have football related discussions and make new friends.

Most Commented

Readers' Comments

I

t all started going downhill when they started putting a photo of the writer along side their story. Journalists started to think that 'they' are the story, rather than what they write. Smug, self obsessed & up their own arse's. That sums up the majority of newspaper sports reporters.

cozens
Do We Need So Much Football Media?

T

he reason so much sh*t is written about football is because there are so many people who want to read sh*t about football. Now shut up, take my money, and tell me Ronaldo is going to sign for Van Haal and that Mick McCarthy is signing Peter Crouch on loan.

hump3.
Do We Need So Much Football Media?

W

enger's delaying tactics in the transfer market creates goose pimples whenever a player is linked to Arsenal. The approach in buying players need to be changed@@#

mokaya
New striker 'on Wenger's list'

Latest Photos

Footer 365

Louis Van Gaal vows to walk away in 2017

Manchester United manager Louis van Gaal is determined to win the Premier League in the next two seasons but will retire in 2017 regardless.

Sergio Romero signs for Manchester United on three-year deal

Manchester United have signed Argentina international goalkeeper Sergio Romero on a three-year contract.

Bastian Schweinsteiger fitness boost for Manchester United

Manchester United have been handed a lift on their pre-season tour with the sight of Bastian Schweinsteiger training again.

Mail Box

Only Arsenal Fans Care About Friendlies

We are not entirely surprised after Arsenal fans leapt to the defence of friendlies. We also have mails on Louis van Gaal, Liverpool and more mundane tales...

Friendlies: Still Completely Meaningless

There is sharp message for anyone thinking about getting excited about friendlies, plus worries about Wayne Rooney. Every one of you has met a bloody footballer...

© 2015 Sky Ltd. All Rights Reserved A Sky Sports Digital Media company