Famous, not to say legendarily well-known, notorious and generally celebrated for posing interview questions that take the form of long sentences with...
As the Premier League season reaches its denouement, we bring you 20 questions regarding the final day...
* Aaron Ramsey has made the most tackles in the PL this season with 33. He made seven v Swansea on Saturday evening.
* The last time Arsenal were eight or more points ahead of United (with equal games played) was May 2005 when the Gunners finished second to United's third.
* Arsenal have equalled a club record by recording eight straight away wins in the PL.
* Aston Villa have averaged just 39.7% possession so far this season - the lowest in the Premier League by some margin.
* They have failed to keep a clean sheet in their last 14 PL games at home.
* Goalkeeper Brad Guzan was the first PL goalkeeper to claim an assist this season.
* Cardiff average the least number of fouls per game (8.3) in the Premier League. No team is fouled less (7 per game) either.
* Fraizer Campbell is second only to Daniel Sturridge in the PL when it comes to losing the ball with a poor first touch (2.8 times per game).
* Gary Medel recorded a phenomenal 99% pass completion rate v Fulham.
* Only two of Chelsea's seven goals this season have come from open play.
* No PL player has been dribbled around more times than Ramires (16) this season.
* Attacking midfield trio Eden Hazard, Oscar and Ramires created only one chance for Chelsea at Spurs on Saturday.
* Crystal Palace are the most prolific tacklers in the PL with an average 24.3 per game.
* They have managed just one shot on target in their last two PL games v Swansea and Southampton.
* Only one Palace player (Damien Delaney) has been credited with a PL assist this season.
* Everton's impressive 12 points from six games is still a worse start than last season, when they picked up 13 points from their first six games.
* Romelu Lukaku has now scored 14 PL goals in 2013; only Christian Benteke (18), Daniel Sturridge (15) and Robin van Persie (15) have scored more.
* Seamus Coleman completed five dribbles without being dispossessed once by Newcastle. He also made seven tackles.
* Fulham are allowing opponents an average 20.3 shots per game - the highest in the PL by some margin.
* They make the fewest tackles per game at 14. They made just ten v Cardiff on Saturday.
* Right-back Sascha Riether made four chances v Cardiff - the same number as all his teammates in total.
* Robbie Brady has scored exactly half Hull's PL goals (3 of 6) so far this season.
* Danny Graham has not scored in his last 1391 Premier League minutes of football.
* Hull out-tackled the Hammers 18-16 on Saturday with Tom Huddlestone contributing five challenges.
* Daniel Sturridge has contributed to the most PL goals this season with five goals and two assists.
* But Sturridge was dispossessed five times v Sunderland - more than the rest of his Liverpool teammates in total.
* Steven Gerrard has created 2.3 chances per game this season. That puts him on a par with Eden Hazard.
* Vincent Kompany has the highest pass completion rate of any PL regular this season at 94.6%.
* City have won only one of their last six away games in the Premier League.
* Samir Nasri made more chances in 66 minutes (3) v Villa than any other player in the whole game.
* Manchester United have been caught offside more times (21) than any other PL side this season. For comparison, Spurs have been caught offside just four times.
* United attempt more crosses than any other side in the PL with an average of 28 per game. They attempted 30 v West Brom but only five reached a teammate.
* Wayne Rooney is 28th on a list of average key passes per game in the PL - he is the highest Manchester United player.
* All Newcastle's seven PL goals this season have been scored by Frenchmen.
* Newcastle recorded a better pass completion rate (86%) than Everton (83%) on Monday night.
* Newcastle played an average of 69 long balls per game last season; this season it's been reduced to 53.
* Ricky van Wolfswinkel did not have a shot of any description v Stoke. He has managed one shot on target in his last five PL games.
* Anthony Pilkington lost the ball six times v Stoke due to a poor touch.
* Only three players - John Ruddy, Van Wolfswinkel and Michael Turner - have started all six PL games for Norwich this season.
* Only one of Southampton's five goals this season has come from open play - Pablo Osvaldo's opener on Saturday.
* None of Southampton's last nine PL games have featured more than two goals.
* Adam Lallana attempted a massive 13 crosses v Palace but only one reached a teammate.
* Stoke City
* Stoke have hit the woodwork four times this season - more than any other PL side.
* No Potters' striker has scored in their opening six PL matches.
* They have won two of their last nine PL games at Britannia Stadium.
* Sunderland had a massive 23 shots to Liverpool's 15 on Sunday.
* The returning Carlos Cuéllar made six tackles and nine clearances v Liverpool.
* Sunderland have won one of their last 11 Premier League games at the Stadium of Light.
* Swansea City
* Swansea have not won any of their last eight PL games at the Liberty Stadium.
* Starting wingers Nathan Dyer and Wayne Routledge failed to create a single chance v Arsenal on Saturday.
* Swansea have the best average pass completion rate (87.1%) in the PL this season.
* Michael Dawson has been credited with catching 16 opposition players offside this season. That's twice as many as West Brom's Gareth McAuley - second on the list.
* Tottenham out-dribbled Chelsea 28-3 on Saturday with Mousa Dembélé skipping past eight Chelsea players.
* Roberto Soldado completed just four passes in 77 minutes v Chelsea - one of those four set up Tottenham's goal.
* Morgan Amalfitano is a champion crosser - 4.3 accurate crosses per game makes him the most prolific in the PL.
* Amalfitano put in more accurate crossers v United (6) than all United players managed in total on Saturday.
* Seven of West Brom's last 11 PL goals have come against United.
* Mohamed Diamé has failed to score with 17 shots this season - he had three v Hull on Saturday.
* They have not scored a single goal in three away games this season.
* Jussi Jääskeläinen attempted only six passes in 90 minutes v Hull. Only two reached a teammate.