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Like an elderly, grumpy cat that has given up its duties as a family pet and now expects to be able to do exactly as it pleases in its twilight years. It's Mark Lawrenson...
There have been some fantastic striking performances this season and many continued their fine early-season form this weekend. Six of the top-scoring seven players that played all netted at least once. City's pairing of Sergio Aguero and Alvaro Negredo effectively demolished Spurs in the stand-out game of the weekend, but there were some glaring misses in the Merseyside and West Midlands derbies.
While Joe Allen will be pleased that WhoScored.com's look at some of the league's most profligate players this season is restricted to forwards, Stephane Sessegnon does not escape examination. We're focusing on three undesirable leaderboards, looking at those with the worst shot accuracy, the most big chances missed and the worst conversion rate from said big chances.
Worst Shot Accuracy
We start with a look at the players that have missed the target all too often this season, with Stoke's Marko Arnautovic the guiltiest culprit of those to attempt at least 20 shots thus far. The Austrian certainly backs himself in front of goal, having mustered 3.1 shots per game - the next highest at Stoke is Charlie Adam (1.8) - but of his 28 shots thus far just six have hit the target (21.4%), with an excellent free-kick against United representing his solitary league goal to date.
The 24-year-old is followed closely by compatriot Andi Weimann, who has been unable to replicate his form from last season. Like Arnautovic, the young Austria international has had the most shots per game for his club (2.9), but he too has netted just once, also against one of the Manchester giants as Villa secured a shock win over City. The 22-year old has hit the target with just seven of his 32 shots (21.9%).
Completing this particular 'top' five are Papiss Cisse, who will unsurprisingly crop up more than once in this article, Fraizer Campbell and the far more shocking inclusion of Olivier Giroud. While the Newcastle man is yet to register this season, hitting the target just five times from 20 efforts (25%), Campbell has three to his name following a goal against his former club this weekend and Giroud took his league tally to seven against Southampton. The Cardiff striker has hit the target just six times (30% accuracy), with Giroud's goals coming from just 14 shots on target (32.6% accuracy).
Most Big Chances Missed
If Giroud's inclusion in the previous standings was a surprise, Sergio Aguero's placing as the league's worst offender in terms of big chances missed may stun even more. To clarify, a big chance can be a one-on-one, free header in a dangerous area, open goal and so on. The Argentine has spurned eight such opportunities this season despite ranking as the league's top scorer with ten thus far.
Behind the City man are Liverpool's Daniel Sturridge and Villa's Christian Benteke, who have each missed six clear-cut opportunities, with the latter's tally including two penalty misses. While the Englishman has hit the ground running with nine league goals this season, Benteke has just four, having now gone over seven hours without a goal (440 minutes).
Speaking of players without a goal, that brings us back round nicely to Cisse, who is one of six players to have missed five big chances thus far but makes this leaderboard due to his inability to net any of said opportunities. He is joined in this regard by West Brom's Nicolas Anelka, with the duo completing this particular category and leading the next.
Worst Big Chance Conversion
As mentioned, with no goals from five big chances apiece both Cisse and Anelka have a 0% conversion rate from clear-cut opportunities. Of all players that have had at least five big chances presented to them this season, the next worse are Stoke's Jonathan Walters, who opened his Premier League account for the season this weekend, and the aforementioned Sessegnon.
Both have scored just one of six big chances (16.7%) that have fallen their way thus far, with the West Brom man not helping his cause on Monday night against Villa. The former Sunderland man was sent off against Lambert's side earlier this year and will be glad to see the back of them having squandered two great opportunities to effectively put the game to bed at The Hawthorns.
Completing the 'top' five this time, making his second appearance here, is Benteke. He's netted just two big chances this season, one of which was a penalty and the other a headed rebound from one of the two spot-kicks that he has failed to convert. With a 25% conversion rate from clear-cut opportunities halved from the 50% of last season (11 scored of 22 total), Villa need their star man to recapture that sort of form if they are to continue their bid for a top-half finish.
Martin Laurence - follow him on Twitter.
All statistics courtesy of WhoScored.com, where you can find yet more stats, including live in-game data and unique player and team ratings.