He's there for the good vibes rather than the insight. Ian Wright might not know exactly what it is that he means, but he means it. And he looks very dapper while he does...
Are you called Robert? Well, you're going to love this quiz. Even if you're not called Robert, you probably know someone who is, so just enjoy it...
1. Which player has scored the most Premier League hat-tricks?
2. How many Premier League hat-tricks has Luis Suarez scored for Liverpool?
3. And how many of these have come against Norwich?
4. Who scored a hat-trick on his debut for Middlesbrough in 1996?
5. Name the opponent and the result.
6. Name the former England Under-21 international who scored a hat-trick in Aston Villa's 7-1 win over Wimbledon in 1995. Clue: He also played for Celtic.
7. True or false: Tony Cottee has scored more Premier League hat-tricks than Frank Lampard.
8. Who scored a hat-trick for Charlton in a 3-2 win over Liverpool in 2003?
9. Which player has scored more Premier League hat-tricks: Darren Bent or Paul Kitson?
10. Name the last Chelsea player to score a hat-trick in the top flight.
11. Which club has scored the most Premier League hat-tricks?
12. And who is in second?
13. Englishmen were responsible for all but seven of the first 40 hat-tricks scored in the Premier League, but which foreign forward scored the first?
14. True or false: Blackburn have scored more Premier League hat-tricks than Chelsea.
15. Who scored a hat-trick for Middlesbrough in their 8-1 victory over Manchester City in 2008?
16. Who scored two hat-tricks in the space of a week in April 2004, helping his team to a 4-2 win over Liverpool and a 5-0 thrashing of Leeds?
17. After the British nations, which country is responsible for the most top-flight hat-tricks?
18. Name the two Germans to score Premier League hat-tricks.
19. Which club has conceded the most Premier League hat-tricks?
20. The first time Man United conceded a Premier League hat-trick was in 2006. Which player bagged the treble?
The answers are here...