Turning 32 in August and with his performances on the wane, have we lost the Robin van Persie we once knew? Remember the majesty of 2012/13, not the decline...
There's little sympathy for Diego Costa, while one mailboxer has had enough of football by numbers. There's also an invitation to visit Colombia and an ode to Woan...
* Arsenal's total of 248 successful passes v Spurs on Sunday is the fewest they have managed in a PL game since 232 v Spurs in February 2009.
* Arsenal and Spurs share the best away record in the PL this season with 29 points.
* Olivier Giroud did not have a single shot or set up a single chance v Spurs; he lost the ball with a poor touch five times.
* Villa have recorded consecutive home wins at Villa Park for the first time since August 2010.
* Marc Albrighton assisted his first PL goal of the season with the 25th chance he had created for his teammates this season. He creates more chances per game (2.1) than any other Villa player.
* Villa out-tackled Chelsea 26-8 with Karim El Ahmadi (7) topping the tackling charts.
* Cardiff have only scored six first-half goals in the Premier League this season.
* Only Steven Gerrard (7) has made more assists from set-pieces than Peter Whittingham this season (five).
* Craig Noone was subbed after completing four passes in 62 minutes v Everton.
* All 14 of Jose Mourinho's Premier League defeats have come away from home. He has not won at Villa Park in in the PL in five attempts.
* Oscar has not contributed a PL goal or assist since January 1 v Southampton.
* Of Fernando Torres' last six PL appearances, he has only managed shots on target v Fulham.
* Crystal Palace have scored just six goals in 14 PL away games this season.
* Palace's total of 23 goals in league and domestic cup this season is lower than any other side in the top four divisions.
* Glenn Murray's average pass completion rate of 49.3% this season is lower than every other PL outfield player to start a game apart from Grant Holt (48.1%).
* Everton are six points better off than the same stage last season under David Moyes but are in the same position (6th).
* Seamus Coleman is the top-scoring defender in the Premier League this season with six goals.
* If games ended after 45 minutes, Everton would be in tenth place; just 12 of their 40 goals have come before the break this season.
* Fulham have conceded just five goals in five PL games in which Fernando Amorebieta and Brede Hangeland have played; they have conceded 60 goals in the remaining 25.
* Lewis Holtby has contributed to as many goals for Fulham in seven games (one goal, two assists) as he did in 24 PL games for Tottenham Hotspur.
* Ashkan Dejagah's 26 minutes on the pitch v Newcastle comprised: Ten touches, twice dispossessed, two completed passes, one yellow card, one shot, one goal.
* Hull's form of seven points from eight games gives them an equal record to West Brom and Cardiff City.
* Hull have taken just one point from their last five games at the KC Stadium.
* Nikica Jelavic has had 40 shots in eight PL games for Hull; only Tom Huddlestone has had more all season.
* Liverpool have scored 48 first-half goals in the PL this season - two more than Manchester United have in total.
* Steven Gerrard has now scored more PL goals at Old Trafford than any other visiting player in the competition's history.
* Jon Flanagan made 11 of Liverpool's 38 tackles v Manchester United at Old Trafford.
* Man City have kept three successive clean sheets in the Premier League for the first time this season (v Norwich, Stoke and Hull).
* Edin Dzeko's goal ended a barren spell of 602 minutes for City with his goal v Hull.
* David Silva has played 3.8 key passes per game in the PL this season - more than any other top-flight player. His nearest rivals are Mesut Ozil (2.9) and Luis Suarez (2.8).
* Man United have scored just ten goals in 13 games against top-half sides this season. That's fewer than every other PL club barring Crystal Palace.
* Only two of Robin van Persie's 11 PL goals and three of Wayne Rooney's 11 PL goals this season have come against top-half sides.
* Attacking trio Adnan Januzaj, Juan Mata and Wayne Rooney were dispossessed a total of 16 times v Liverpool.
* Luuk de Jong has mustered one shot on target in his last four PL games; he hit the target with one of five attempts at Fulham.
* Newcastle are ten points better off than the same stage last season but have scored three fewer goals.
* Newcastle are the only PL side to record only one away draw in the PL this season.
* Johan Elmander had gone 1075 minutes of PL football this season without a goal before Saturday v Southampton.
* Norwich strikers account for only seven of their 23 PL goals this season.
* Gary Hooper recorded a 100% pass completion rate v Southampton. That consisted of four passes in 65 minutes.
* Englishmen account for 28 of Southampton's 43 PL goals this season; they also account for 24 PL assists.
* Daniel Sturridge (18) is the only Englishman to have scored more goals than Jay Rodriguez in the Premier League this season (12).
* If games ended at half-time, Southampton would be sixth - ahead of Man United, Tottenham and Everton.
* Only Stoke, Man City and Liverpool are undefeated in three PL games.
* Mark Hughes' Stoke have picked up the same number of points (34) from 30 games as Tony Pulis' Stoke last season.
* Stoke City have completed more passes this season (8764) than in any of their previous five PL campaigns - despite them having eight games left.
* Sunderland have won just one of their last eight Premier League home games (W1 D3 L4).
* Sunderland have scored a joint-low (with Palace and Norwich) 13 home goals this season and have mustered just 47 shots on target at the Stadium of Light (a league low).
* They had 19 goal attempts v Palace (10 from set-pieces) but only two were on target.
* Wilfried Bony has had a hand in 11 PL goals this season (nine goals, two assists) - 10 of which have been at the Liberty Stadium.
* Swansea threw away a half-time lead for the first time this season v West Brom on Saturday.
* Jonathan De Guzmán was the only Swans player to test Ben Foster in the second half.
* Tottenham had 17 shots v Arsenal but 12 of those shots came from outside the penalty area.
* Andros Townsend attempted eight crosses v Arsenal but only one reached a teammate. He has not claimed a single PL assist this season.
* Tottenham have lost three of their last four PL games, scoring only one goal (v Cardiff) in the process.
* Stéphane Sessegnon scored his first goal for nine hours and 49 minutes v Swansea.
* West Brom came from behind to win in the PL for the first time in over a year (since March 2013).
* The Baggies have scored in the first half of just one (v Aston Villa) of their last ten PL games.
* Thirteen of Andy Carroll's 28 Premier League goals have been scored with his head (46%).
* West Ham have lost more games (5) and more points (17) from winning positions than any other Premier League side this season.
* Mohamed Diamé was dispossessed seven times v Stoke and completed just seven passes.