This week Johnny goes all Oirish, so he does, and wonders if Richard Dunne is the victim of a nuclear explosion.
Club managers 'rest' players because they don't really care if they’re knocked out. It's as simple as that.
This week Johnny goes dahn sarf to the Romford manah, my son. It’s only that fackin’ Ray Parlour, geezer.
Not for his poorer, later albums. Our Johnny is in philosophical mood after Wayne Rooney's record...
Please prove the 'he doesn't know the league' idiots wrong, Pep; stop making a right cock of things...
Sorry, but what the hell does that mean? Johnny is confused for a reason - it makes no sense.
Johnny is a little in love with Milner, who could fit into any era. His parents are even called Peter and Lesley.
Stuff a winter break. Clubs should play on Christmas Day and Boxing Day. It's what the fans want and deserve.
Yes, Johnny has gone meta. And frankly we can't work out whether it's awful or wonderful...
Nev underwhelmed, yet his point was fair. But is it already too late to reverse the vacuous, dishonest press?
It's another one of Sky’s "oh...is that what he’s called" presenters that we all know, but we don't know we know.
He looks like a schoolboy and the old Scottish guard aren't happy. Johnny is amused in Chillyjockoland.
He is anonymous to many, but a voice we all know. Johnny profiles BT Sport's Ian Darke.
Managers are implored to "play their best XI", but that makes as much sense as thinking there is a best olive oil.
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