Look, He Didn't Kill Anyone, Okay?

More Liverpool oddness in the Mails over chewy Luis, but thankfully we have excellent thoughts on Jack Wilshere, Real Madrid and Sturridge too. Plus some awful punnery...

Last Updated: 25/06/14 at 16:51

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Oh Arsenal. Why Oh Why Oh Effing Why?

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We have plenty of fallout from Arsenal's latest display of outrageous incompetence, plus the question of why every team seems to be getting worse. Plus, another Garcia ghost goal...

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We have some great responses to young Jack's question about how readers first got into football. Plus, finally some intelligent thoughts on Dave Whelan's outburst...

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More Liverpool Oddness
It was a headbutt, watch it in fast motion. Balotelli flying kick not mentioned anywhere, but he's a 'character' ishe?

Suarez does something it's magnified to ridiculous levels. I've noticed people want him banned for life, that wouldn't be Man United fans
by any chance would it? People only want him banned cause they know how good he is and are running scared.

Zidane's Headbutt anyone, that's OK though yeah? Ashley Cole shooting someone. That's fine? People should man up and stop all this mock outrage.

It could be worse he could have gone out to deliberately to injure a player and brag about it in a book!

...Suarez bit Chiellini yesterday. The third time he's bitten someone in total.

It's ACTUALLY pretty funny, people just need to lose their s**t over stuff and come out with histrionics and hyperbole.

During Colombia v Japan last night, BBC3 aired a package about the murder of Andres Escobar 20 years ago. This was a heavy piece and it served as a reminder to me that truly awful things have been done in the world of football.

The host country is mired in poverty as the government pumps more and more money into the tournament. Future World Cups are steeped in controversy about corruption and being held in areas with less than stellar records for the rights of all people.

Get some perspective, you mewling morons.
Kris, LFC, Manchester

Real Won't Be Put Off
Got to knock Conor, London's claim that Ancellotti wouldn't trust Suarez in an El Classico. Real Madrid have Pepe and Ramos. Ramos have several red cards to his name, including cards in El Classicos whilst Pepe is a sociopath on the football field.

Youtube "Pepe goes crazy" for some of his discretions, the worst being his assault on three players including one lying on the ground. His most recent one? His red card against Germany for an Alan Pardew esque head rutt.

It's almost as if these football managers don't care what type of person they have on their books as long as they are absolutely mustard at playing football.
Alex (I'd have all three in my team too) London

Arsenal Fan Not Impressed By Wilshere
There will no doubt be an awful lot of post-mortem analysis of England's World Cup campaign.

But something and someone I wanted to highlight: I watched England V Costa Rica last night. At one point I found myself screaming "get up you T**T!" at Jack Wilshere (well actually at the TV, but it was intended for Wilshere). He had done his usual trick of trying to take on too many players, being muscled off of the ball, and then lying on the ground seemingly uninjured but in disbelief whilst the game unfolded around him, sometimes with the opposition attacking as Wilshere had lost it in a dangerous area.

As an Arsenal fan I find this common occurrence fills me with rage. I will compare him to Oxlade-Chamberlain as another Arsenal and England young midfielder. When he loses a ball (much rarer than Wilshere) he gets up (if he ever went down) immediately and goes to win the ball back, and not in a desperate atoning for his error Steven Gerrard kind of way.

Wilshere seems to think he is the most important man out there, that everything he does is correct, and therefore if he has lost the ball, he must have been fouled, and thinks showing his disbelief will encourage the ref to give him a free kick. His comments before the World Cup indicated that he believes he is a senior player, "We've got a great squad - young players, experienced players and a few that are in the middle. I don't see myself as a young player anymore."

This is a 22 year old man with only 20 caps, only 15 before the World Cup warm up games. Oxlade-Chamberlain had 14 before the warm up games (and 3 goals) and these comments came after rather patronising comments on how young players like Oxlade-Chamberlain recover quickly, and that he (the Ox) has a great attitude for a young player.

I'm not sure what my point is now, he's immature, think's he's made it, and needs to learn an awful lot, some of which he could learn from the players around him he patronisingly refers to as the young players. He needs a properly experienced player to reign him in, I hope it happens at Arsenal, as it won't with England because he is likely to be a regular England player for years to come with no experienced players to learn from. He already thinks he is the finished article.

This is of course not particularly related to the performance of England at the World Cup, as he wasn't heavily involved, perhaps if he had built upon the potential he has shown for the last four years he would have been.

Fair Point
Just a quick note for the "if I bit someone in my office I'd be fired" brigade. If you performed a perfectly-executed slide tackle or went up fairly for a header in your office I imagine it wouldn't be long before the boss started asking questions either.

I understand the sentiment, but please stop comparing your nine-to-five office environment with that of a footballer. They are patently different and cannot be compared.
Mike Paul

Won't Someone Think Of The Football
Not one mention of Columbia's performance, Faryd Mondragon lumbering onto the pitch aged 43, the brilliance of James Rodriguez, the drama of the Greece/Ivory Coast game, the second round shaping up to be a cracker, the fact that one of the games is Costa Rica v Greece and how that looks like an unbelievably wasted opportunity for England, no mention that now Spain, Italy, England (all former winners) are all out now. Bosnia and Hipstergovenia are out too.

The World Cup comes but every four years folks. Enjoy the spectacle. There is plenty else to talk about.

We've all seen Suarez bite someone before, chances are he will do it again.

Savour the World Cup. It'll be over soon and we can all get back to the average overpaid footballers in the most hyped league in the world in due course.
DC, Dublin

Sturridge Finishing Like Cole
I said at the start of the tournament that he reminded me of Andy Cole and the big clue for me was his performance against Honduras before the tournament.

Rooney should have been our no. 9 and seeing Sturridge miss chance after chance yesterday only cemented that in my mind. If Rooney had put in the performance Sturridge had against Honduras and Costa Rica then the papers and white van drivers would have the effigy they're after. A

gainst Uruguay we needed the Danny Welbeck of two years ago to make those selfless runs across the back line instead what we got was no.9 who had clearly eaten too many chicken teriyaki subs.
Ibrahim Ali Khalid

Wading Through The Bulls**t
I was delighted to see the following on the ever-wonderful Mediawatch today:

'Redemption is achieved or earned by showing atonement, remorse and regret and admitting responsibility for all of your past actions.'

Thank you F365 for being a continuing voice of sanity and reason (on so many fronts) in a world where the media is, all too often, heart-sinkingly crazy.

But how shameful for your allegedly more "serious" peers that it is only on a football website that such decent, moral sentiment is to be found.
Carolyn, Devoted F365 Reader and South London Gooner

Unforgivable Punnery
Strong rumours that Suarez fancies a move to Bayern Münich. Along with his shoulder of Lahm, he'll be able to enjoy Götze cheese salad as a starter, with Neuer potatotoes and Ribereye steak for a main.

Even if he has his teeth removed as punishment at least he can still enjoy a Müller.
Claremont Rootes

Can the people who are defending Suarez please stop putting 'LFC' in your sign-offs.

It really isn't necessary.
Nareik, Exiled in Dublin

Sold I To The Merchant Ships
Managed to read today's Mediawatch with no issues, only upon seeing your Twitter feed do I now have redemption song stuck in my head.

Won't you help to sing?
Brian, Cork

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Readers' Comments


ame at 0-0 and missed loads of chances. Did he think it was agiven that Arsenal would win. Don't understand the shock from him. Put the ball in the net. They didn't and couldn't do that so they lost when utd could do that. Simple really. No need to be shocked.

Arteta: Defeat 'not fair'


think Arsenal's chances of getting something from that game would have improved infinitely if Arteta wasn't anywhere near the pitch.

Arteta: Defeat 'not fair'


eanwhile, England's best U21 players playing with those most likely to be in the senior team from 2020 onwards might increase their chances in those tournaments to a point where they could actually be potential winners. Unlike 2016.

Wenger warns Hodgson

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Oh Arsenal. Why Oh Why Oh Effing Why?

We have plenty of fallout from Arsenal's latest display of outrageous incompetence, plus the question of why every team seems to be getting worse. Plus, another Garcia ghost goal...

A Funny Mail About Line Dancing & More

We have some great responses to young Jack's question about how readers first got into football. Plus, finally some intelligent thoughts on Dave Whelan's outburst...

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