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Hats off to The Sun's Shaun Custis this morning for some genuinely top, top scooping.
Their front page - front page - story by Mr Custis runs with the headline 'ENGLAND IN RACE STORM No2 - EXCLUSIVE AFTER JT ROW.'
Next to this headline is a picture of Stuart Pearce, who as you'll all know was appointed as temporary England manager on Thursday, and it announces a 'new racism storm' for the England team, after the John Terry gubbins.
A race row involving Stuart Pearce? What could it be? Now, there was the incident when Pearce had to apologise to Paul Ince for allegedly racially abusing him when they were players, but that was in 1994, various public statements had been made, it was mentioned in The Observer at the end of last year and The Guardian on Thursday as well as any number of other places over the years. Such a widely-known if hugely unpleasant incident would surely have been discussed by the FA before they gave him the under-21s gig, never mind the seniors.
So that can't be the big front page EXCLUSIVE! surely.
Custis reports: 'Pearce, 49, had to apologise to black star Paul Ince for allegedly racially abusing him when both were players.'
Oh.
Harry's Tactics Truck
Of course, The Sun continues with the official line of the national press by presenting the case for Harry Redknapp to be the next England manager.
'All the pieces that make Harry perfect choice' announces the headline, introducing a piece which features interviews with assorted chaps who have worked with Harry in the past, and tell how absolutely wonderful he is.
Much of it rings true, their argument does fall down rather when it comes to a testimonial on tactics. Now, we don't believe for a minute that Redknapp is as tactically unaware as he likes to make out, but the following from Rafa van der Vaart hardly inspires confidence that Harry could out-think Vicente del Bosque or Jogi Lurrrrve.
'Harry knows how to tactically beat teams and he tells the players. But there is not too much emphasis on that. Most of his tactics are prepared through selection. He is able to pick a team that will win a game. He knows what his players are capable of.
'For instance, one weekend Gareth Bale scored a header against Blackburn from my corner. But we didn't train one minute on it, it was pure luck. Good kicking, good heading, nothing more. And our win at home over Champions League winners Inter Milan was a clear example of just playing on intuition. You can't train the goal I scored in that game.'
Fortunes
Sage words from Sir Alex Ferguson on the anointed Harry this morning.
"He has changed the fortunes of every club he has been at," quoth Sir.
Quite so. Fans of administration enthusiasts Portsmouth and the relegated Southampton will testify to that one.
The Numbers Game
'The cost of appointing Harry Redknapp as England manager will exceed £10million - before the FA pay him a penny in wages' - EXCLUSIVE! in The Daily Mail.
'FA chiefs will have to pay Spurs £5million to make Harry Redknapp the next England boss' - EXCLUSIVE! in The Daily Mirror
'It would cost them about £4million in compensation to Spurs to get Redknapp' - The Daily Express.
Show Your Face
Hats off to Paul Merson, who in his column for Sky Sports.com about the Fabio Capello hoopla, says:
'Also, there's no way in a million years that an Englishman would have done what Capello did this week. You'd never be able to show your face again if you resigned from the England job. If you get the sack that's fair enough, but I can't understand why you'd resign so close to a tournament.'
Five words for you Merse: 'Don Revie and Kevin Keegan.'
And then there was this nugget regarding Arry and his Spurs team:
'You only have to look at the way Tottenham play the game; it's very rare that they go anywhere and don't look like scoring.'
Yes, very rare indeed. In fact one has to go back as far as, oh I dunno, five days ago at Anfield?
Thoroughly Confusing Statement Of The Day
'With Harry, two plus two always makes five, not three. Harry sees the whole picture' - Milan Mandaric in The Guardian. Erm, what?
Worst Headline Of The Day
'Anfelled' - The Sun.
Typo Of The Day
'Redknapp: "On long drive this morning you start to think about thongs..." - The BBC's Dan Roan makes us feel slightly bilious.
Non-Football Story Of The Day
'Nearly six years after the US ambassador's wife reported jewellery worth millions of euros stolen from a Dutch hotel room, police said on Thursday it had actually been gathering dust in a forgotten drawer for years. The $9.3m collection of gold- and diamond-set jewellery was found if the hotel room where the couple stayed for a few months leading up to the supposed 2006 theft. Dawn Arnall did not even know her jewellery was missing until months after the hotel stay. She assumed the jewellery was stolen, but hotel workers had in fact handed the rings, necklaces and earrings to management for safekeeping.
'The items went unclaimed for six months, so a female employee was allowed to keep them, in line with hotel policy, police spokesman Wim Hoonhout said. "Nobody realised the value of the jewellery," Hoonhout said. One of the necklaces was set with a five-carat rose diamond worth $5.3m. The female employee promptly put the jewels away in a cupboard and forgot about them. Last year while doing housework, she rediscovered the items and decided to have them valued. She then handed the jewellery to police, who last month returned them to Arnall, back in the United States where her husband Roland had died of cancer in 2008. In the meantime, an insurance company had paid out for the missing jewellery' - AFP.
Thanks to today's Mediawatch spotters Daniel Tilles, Tom Strachan and John Whelan. If you spot anything that belongs on this page, mail us at theeditor@football365.com, putting 'Mediawatch' in the subject field.
