Sacking David Moyes will cost United £200million (sort of) (not at all). Plus United are now as bad as Chelsea and Manchester City, in that they want their managers to be successful
Mediawatch is dizzy after reading so many U-turns on David Moyes, while Tim Sherwood spotted Christian Eriksen first...
Mediawatch would never dream of condoning tweets like 'Now I fancy putting a bullet in your head you utter c**t', even when it is directed at your friend and ours Adrian Durham. The TalkSPORT presenter and Daily Mail website columnist re-tweeted said charming tweet, adding the words 'just gotta hope my kids don't read this'. We can't help thinking that they have a great deal more chance of reading it now it's been re-tweeted by their father. It's unlikely they paid too much attention to the tweets of an Arsenal fan with 145 followers.
(By the way, that rather unpleasant Arsenal fan is called Mr Tah and his Twitter bio simply and rather ironically reads 'a law abiding citizen').
Sending tweets suggesting bullets to the heads of even the most odious radio presenters is just plain wrong, kids, but you don't have to go far to work out how and why Mr Durham might have wound up Arsenal fans on Thursday. Not far at all. On Mediawatch's PC, you only have to scroll a few inches.
'Can't help smiling at Arsenal fans saying the last 8 years of no trophies were worth it just for this start to the season. Bless.'
'I've just been told Wenger has performed miracles for the past 8 years. I think Jesus's reputation as top miracle man is safe to be fair.'
'That 8-2 defeat at Manchester United #WengerMiracle' before retweeting 12 other #WengerMiracles from his hilarious followers.
'A great win for Arsenal in Europe. They've had loads of those before and they were all ultimately meaningless. Drive from 4pm 08717223344.'
None of the above justifies that tweet from the law-abiding Mr Tah but it's not difficult to see how winding up Arsenal fans might lead to, well, wound-up Arsenal fans. But it's absolutely definitely not Durham's fault. And nor is it Mr Tah's, to be fair.
Here's Durham to explain: 'Hate generated by certain websites & tweeters has led to that sickening "bullet" tweet I RTd earlier. Hopefully a few of you will realise'.
No Joy In Repetition
'IT'S time to face the facts and admit what other pundits can't bring themselves to admit,' writes Robbie Savage in his Daily Mirror column as he backs Arsenal - currently five points clear at the top of the table - to win the title. Such a brave boy. While others cower, Savage puts his head on the block.
Just as he did in March 2011 when he called on Arsenal to sack Arsene Wenger, in December 2012 when he said Wenger should walk away as 'history has caught up with him', just three months ago when he said Arsenal would struggle to reach the top four and then later in August when he said that 'the Arsenal manager has put himself under ludicrous pressure by failing to spend the war chest available to him in the summer'.
It's almost as if he parrots exactly what Arsenal fans are saying to him on 6-0-6. That's not punditry, Robbie, that's repetition.
'GERRARD SHOCK' is the back page of the Daily Mail. What's the shock? Has he admitted that he preferred Phil Collins' Genesis era to his solo work? No. the 'GERRARD SHOCK' is that Brendan Rodgers has said: "Steven probably looks at this as his last international year."
Wow. That is a shock. Or at least it is to anybody who was living on the moon three months ago when Gerrard told an England press conference: "I've got to assume it's my last year."
Apeing Against Ape
'ROY GOES APE' is a great headline. Or at least it would have been a great headline if Roy Hodgson had looked anything other than ever-so-slightly annoyed when asked once again about the 'space monkey' nonsense during Thursday's press conference. The Sun call him 'exasperated' and 'clearly agitated' but even that was stretching the truth a little. But 'goes ape'? Nope. Save it, fellas.
From Derek McGovern in the Daily Mirror: 'ADAM LALLANA and Jay Rodriguez have been called up by Roy Hodgson - at this rate there'll be more Southampton players in the England squad than there are in the Southampton squad.'
Poor Rio. He must be past it because he's only started nine games this season. Poor old Rio.
Says The Sun: 'RIO FERDINAND is ready to prove himself all over again at Manchester United after turning 35 this week. The former England defender has started just nine games in all competitions this season after being hit by more injury problems.'
Number of outfield United players who have started more games than Rio this season: Six.
It's almost like the whole team is being rotated. But yes Rio, prove yourself if you must.
A Man Out Of Time
Giving his views on the Ashley Young diving storm, this could only be one man: 'Never mind the technicality of that tug at your elbow in Spain this week, which was so slight it would not have distracted your attention from a pretty girl at a cocktail party.'
Jeff Powell. Looking at pretty girls at cocktail parties and cursing the influence of foreigners since about 1963.
Sexy Quote Of The Day
"He has a good stamina and a strong body" - it seems we're not the only ones with a crush on Olivier Giroud. But what about his face, Arsene? What about his beautiful face?
Underwhelming Compliment Of The Day
"It's too early to tell the difference under Moyes. He has shown great competence at Everton" - Wenger again.
Headline Of The Day
'LET'S CALL THE MOLE THING OFF' - The Daily Star. Credit where it's due, this is genius.
Non-Football Story Of The Day
'A Brazilian cuddly mascot is doing his bit to help raise awareness of testicular cancer - and he's called Mr Balls. Senhor Testiculo, as he is known in his native country, is a spokesperson - of sorts - for a group seeking to raise awareness of the disease and raise funds for new research into it. It may be a rather graphic method, but by letting it all hang out, the group's "friendly snowman," as they call him, is making a real difference. A spokesperson for Brazil's Association of Personal Assistance for Cancer said: "Both children and adults loved taking pictures with the mascot, a friendly snowman in the shape of testicles."' - The Daily Mirror.
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