The Page That Thinks It Was The Eggs

Another tedious update on the captaincy at Man United courtesy of the Daily Mail, and apparently Barcelona don't care about tapping up rules. Who knew?

Last Updated: 06/08/14 at 12:46

Latest Articles

The Page That Is Licking Its Licks

Post comment

Louis van Gaal must be feeling helluva stupid right now while Arsenal play four central midfielders and the Daily Star can reveal their next manager. Again.

The Page That Approves Of The Nuclear Option

Post comment

Malky Mackay is a proper football man; perhaps he can fight the Stalinist monsters from Zurich...

All Articles

Developing Situation
'CAPTAIN ROO' chirps the headline on the back page of the Daily Mail. 'Louis eyes Wayne to lead United.'

Well, we guess that's finally sorted. It's not as though the Mail have had a different take on who'll captain United almost every week throughout the summer.

Oh, hang on a second...

'Louis van Gaal sees Robin van Persie as perfect captain for Manchester United' - May 18.

'Robin van Persie will be Louis van Gaal's captain at Manchester United, says club legend Bryan Robson' - July 20.

'Wayne Rooney should become Manchester United's new captain...but Robin van Persie will get the armband, says Paul Scholes' - July 30.

'Manchester United captaincy race is between Robin van Persie, Wayne Rooney, Jonny Evans and Darren Fletcher' - August 1.

Is it really so important that it requires all this speculation? Don't worry, folks, Van Gaal will make his decision eventually.


How's That Going?
It takes a lot for Mediawatch to feel sorry for someone who carries around a 'Beanie Horse' as a mascot, but Stuart Pearce has gained our sympathy during a rough week at Nottingham Forest.

Pearce was quoted in the Sunday Times as saying: "The owners have been fantastically supportive to me. They've been to their word. There have been a lot of positives but there is a lot of hard work in front of us."

But it's clear the mood has changed as Pearce said on Tuesday: "I am not prepared to fluff things when it comes to what was said and done behind the scenes. Two players were sold against my will. It disappointed me. If it was my money, the boys would not have been sold."

It looks like Beanie Horse still isn't bringing much luck.


Drain
Headline in the Daily Mail: 'MailOnline TODAY: The Wenger talent drain...As Bacary Sagna becomes the sixth star to leave Arsenal for Manchester, has Arsene Wenger been right to allow so much talent leave the Emirates for his rivals?'

Two things:

1) Arsenal didn't choose to allow Sagna to join City. They offered him a new contract but he decided to leave on a free transfer.

2) Sagna's move was announced on June 12. Why has it taken almost eight weeks for the Mail to cotton on?


So Sorry
Said Barcelona president Josep Maria Bartomeu: "He apologized. That's very important for us. That means he knows that he did not do things properly - and of course, coming to our city, coming to our club, there's going to be a way of managing Luis Suarez, because at Liverpool he was a perfect player."

Ignoring the frankly ludicrous suggestion that Suarez was a 'perfect player' at Liverpool, does Bartomeu not remember how difficult it was to strain an apology out of the striker?

"These situations happen on the field. I had contact with his shoulder, nothing more. Things like that happen all the time," said Suarez immediately after biting Giorgio Chiellini.

And again a week later, after having time to reflect on his latest indiscretion: "In no way it happened how you have described, as a bite or intent to bite. After the impact I lost my balance, making my body unstable and falling on top of my opponent. At that moment I hit my face against the player leaving a small bruise on my cheek and a strong pain in my teeth."

But of course, he's finally apologised so it's all okay. Nothing to see here.


Shock Horror
'Barca had nibble at Suarez before Brazil' blasts the headline on the back page of the Daily Mirror.

What's that? Barcelona flagrantly disobeying the practically extinct tapping up rules? The same Barcelona whose motto is 'More Than A Club'? The Barcelona who were so courteous in their patient pursuit of Cesc Fabregas?

Well colour Mediawatch surprised.


TC23
Normally Mediawatch wouldn't poke fun at the more banal quotes of footballers, seeing as they all say pretty much the same thing in every interview. But Tom Cleverley has provided such an astonishing example of speaking in platitudes that it merits inclusion.

"I've got to use last season as a learning curve," said Cleverley of recent criticism. "It makes you develop a thicker skin. You've got to take it on the chin. Yeah, I got a bit of stick. It hurts when it comes from your fans but I won't dwell on it."

Learning curve, tick. Developing a thick skin, tick. Taking it on the chin, tick. Refusing to dwell on it, tick. Mediawatch just called 'house' in footballer cliche bingo.


Rule, Britannia
"You don't see what we've got too often in the Premier League and it's a massive part of our togetherness," said Hull's Jake Livermore. "We have got a British squad and it's terrific to be a part of it."

Number of Brits in Hull's squad: 13
Number of non-Brits: 13

Someone tell UKIP.


Worst Headline Of The Day'
MEN UTD' - The Sun.


Poll Of The Day
'Do men in Stoke-on-Trent still have the longest manhoods in the UK?' - The Sentinel.

My, my, MY, Delilah.

Non-Football Headline Of The Day
'Fugitive British drug baron and ostrich farm fraudster caught in South Africa' - the Guardian.

Non-Football Story Of The Day
'Authorities say a New York woman who crashed her car into a Long Island fire house was found to be in possession of marijuana - and a stolen snake wrapped around her neck.

'Nassau County police say Sarah Espinosa, of Albany, was driving west on Jericho Turnpike on Monday when she crossed the center median and struck a vehicle. They say she continued through the front door of the New Hyde Park fire house and collided with two fire trucks.

'Fire personnel rushed to her aid and were surprised to find a small ball python around her neck. Authorities say the snake had been stolen from a nearby pet store shortly before the accident.

'Espinosa faces charges including reckless endangerment and driving while intoxicated' - ksat.com

Thanks to Brendan MacCarron, Luke Jacobs and Pete Starr. If you spot something that belongs on this page, mail us at theeditor@football365.com, putting 'Mediawatch' in the subject field.

Football365 Facebook Fan Page

The Football365 fan page is a great place to meet like minded people, have football related discussions and make new friends.

Most Commented

Readers' Comments

M

eanwhile, England's best U21 players playing with those most likely to be in the senior team from 2020 onwards might increase their chances in those tournaments to a point where they could actually be potential winners. Unlike 2016.

shagwa
Wenger warns Hodgson

I

m not a doctor, but the cause is likely to be crap dancing after scoring. My prognosis is we may need to take that leg off.

GVMUFC
Rodgers reveals Sturridge woe

F

or the time being we just have to focus on the players we do have, Rodgers said. We have to make the best of what is available. Jesus wept!

rodger's gusset
Rodgers reveals Sturridge woe

Latest Photos

Footer 365

Ligue 1: Lyon held by Bastia, Monaco grind out a point, Rennes climb

Lyon missed out on the opportunity to leapfrog Marseille in to second place in Ligue 1 as they were held 0-0 by Bastia.

Premier League: Arsene Wenger is frustrated by loss to Man United

Arsenal boss Arsene Wenger insists his side should have got something from their 2-1 loss to Manchester United.

Premier League: Van Gaal stays grounded after first away win propels United into the top-four

Manchester United manager Louis van Gaal played down his side’s first away win of the season at Arsenal.

Mail Box

A Funny Mail About Line Dancing & More

We have some great responses to young Jack's question about how readers first got into football. Plus, finally some intelligent thoughts on Dave Whelan's outburst...

United Fans Would Gladly Take Wilshere

That's the message to any Arsenal fans who don't appreciate the midfielder. Plus, plenty on everyone's current favourite football club chairman and a wee question about fandom...

© 2014 British Sky Broadcasting Ltd. All Rights Reserved A Sky Sports Digital Media property