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"You need a project," says Rafael Benitez. Start spending, and he'll stay at Newcastle for ten years.
Rafa would prefer Kenedy to continue scoring, even his form takes him out of Newcastle's reach...
Big clubs are supposedly sniffing around Jamaal Lascelles but Rafa says the defender is fine where he is.
Harry Kane knows where 2Pac is, and will bag against Man City. Bobby Firmino is scoring too.
Pep could really do with ending this run, while Hughes, Allardyce and Palace all need good news stories...
Don't get too excited, Man United or Spurs fans. Both are English, and one is still uncapped.
Dybala to Liverpool, Rashford unhappy at Man United, Kenedy has big admirers...
It was a struggle coming up with 10, half of which were new to the Premier League. The top three, though...
Joe Hart top of the winners? What madness is this? What witchcraft?
Crystal Palace have as many players as Man United in the team of the week. So that's something.
Roy Keane, Cheick Tiote, Luis Suarez and, erm... Colin Cameron...
Mails on a little game that happened yesterday teatime. Lads, it's Manchester City...
Their January transfer window was worthy of a 'C' at best, and yet it has surely helped keep Newcastle up.
The 50-50 is a dying art in football, so when something like this happens, you have to cherish it.
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