Spot The Difference
A game for you now this Monday morning, you lucky punters.
See if you can spot the quite crucial difference between the following quotes from Harry Redknapp.
Here's Harry on Southampton's relegation in 2004/5, which he was in charge for: "No one was more upset than I was that the club got relegated that year."
And here's Harry on Portsmouth's survival in 2005/6, which he was also in charge for: "I managed to keep them up somehow."
'Reality bites Saints' reads the headline above a section of Martin Samuel's column in The Daily Mail.
Samuel writes: 'Played 6, Won 1, Drawn 2, Lost 3. Not exactly the brightest start for new Southampton manager Mauricio Pochettino, is it?
'The previous six games under Nigel Adkins yielded a win and four draws, the six before that three wins and a draw. Southampton are playing some bright football, but they were anyway, and the forward momentum Adkins had achieved has now slowed.
'It was always a bizarre decision to change manager at such an important stage in the season and, whatever the long-term objectives, to be sucked back into the relegation battle was an unnecessary short-term risk.'
Southampton position when Nigel Adkins was sacked: 15th, four points outside the relegation zone.
Southampton position now: 16th, three points outside the relegation zone.
Sucked back indeed.
A Quick Reminder
Today, as Spurs sit rather comfortably in third place, is probably a good time to remind you all of a couple of reactions to the sacking of Harry Redknapp last summer.
The Sun's Charlie Wyett took it well. Addressing Daniel Levy, he said: 'You have failed over many years to get Spurs a stadium - and now you sack Redknapp. Let's see where Tottenham finish next season.'
And John Cross of The Daily Mirror was similarly sensible: 'If a foreign owner had done what Levy has done then we'd be up in arms. This is up there with the Venky's. You can't justify it on results.'
Hats off to Mark Lawrenson, the gift that keeps on giving throughout the week.
On Friday he appeared on 'The Last Word' radio show in Ireland, and among his tasks was to select a charity bet for the weekend. He selected a real Hail Mary treble of Arsenal, Newcastle and QPR to win (one out of three isn't bad. Apart from if you actually want to win the bet).
A quick glance at his predictions column for the BBC website revealed his prediction for Swansea v Newcastle: 1-1.
Those poor orphans.
Headline from The Daily Express: 'Gunners won't recover claims AVB.'
Headline from The Daily Mail: 'YOU'RE SINKING - Arsenal taunted by AVB.'
Headline from The Daily Star: 'GUN FOR - Arsenal may not recover from this taunts AVB.'
Headline from The Daily Mirror: 'YOUR SEASON IS OVER.'
Sample quotes from Andre Villas-Boas's post-match reaction that curiously didn't make it into the headlines: "It's not a big margin yet for us to be completely safe."
Ever wondered what Mikael Silvestre is doing now? Well, wonder no more, for he is playing for the Portland Timbers in America.
The former Manchester United and Arsenal (sorry Gooners) made his debut for the Oregon side over the weekend and...well, let's just say it didn't go well.
Well, That's One Way
Steaua Bucharest owner and noted loon Gigi Becali found a novel way of dishing out his complimentary tickets for their upcoming clash with Chelsea.
If you weren't in the front row, you were missing out.
Quote Of The Day
"I was shocked when they cheered me coming off. Thanks for that lads. It was my first start in a long time" - Stephen Hunt endears himself to Wolves fans.
Brendanism Of The Day
"We were not efficient in those decisive zones, not at the back or up front" - Arsene Wenger.
Headline Of The Day
'Mad about the Boyd' - We're sure this has been done before, but we still enjoyed this from The Daily Mirror.
Worst Headline Of The Day
'Lamb has beef with hard luck' - The Sun.
Non-Football Story Of The Day
'A WOMAN has appeared in court accused of trying to suffocate her boyfriend with her breasts. Karin Hoffer is accused of forcing her boyfriend's head into her breasts as they made love. A court heard that Andreas Koller struggled to breathe as he was attacked during sex, The Sun reports. Prosecutors say when he did break free from her chest, Karin, 33, then tried to strangle him with her hands. She was charged with GBH after the alleged attack in Unna, Germany. Judges suspended the case when defence lawyers told the court that the accused had suffered "psychological trauma" and was unfit to stand trial. Andreas Koller told the court: "I really did love her with all my heart." He added: "What she needs isn't a sentence, but proper psychiatric therapy" - The Daily Telegraph.com.au.
Thanks to today's Mediawatch spotters Ferg Kenny and Cameron Newlands. If you see anything that belongs on this page, mail us at firstname.lastname@example.org, putting 'Mediawatch' in the subject field.