It was a case of when, rather than if really.
Alan Shearer's return to Newcastle was inevitable, and as usual Sky Sports have found a collection of goons outside St James's willing to express their delight, man, and sing 'Shearer's Coming Home'.
Even at this relatively early stage, F365 has received a number of e-mails from giddy Toon fans hailing the Second Coming (or maybe the Second Second Coming after Keggy. Or perhaps the Second Second Second Coming after he came back again). The phrase 'I can't see any down sides' has been used.
It's baffling. Why do fans want their playing heroes to return? In this case it's initially not quite as bad, as Shearer is only there for eight games, but what if he wins them all (highly unlikely, but bear with me) and Newcastle end up closer to a European place than the relegation zone? The clamour for him to stay will be deafening, and it will be an emotional call that he won't be able to ignore.
Between now and the end of this season Shearer has absolutely nothing to lose. Succeed and he moves from messiah to deity. Fail and it's the last guy's fault. He can return to the Match of the Day couch and say 'Well, I gave it a shot', before churning out another pointless banality.
Yet if he stays - and at this stage it's a pretty hefty 'if' - there are very few circumstances under which he can succeed. Unless he wins the league there is no way he can go up in anyone's estimation. His legacy as a player is that of a super-human goal machine, a hero rivalled only by Milburn, Keegan and MacDonald.
He has no experience, and if his punditry is anything to go by, he has minimal tactical expertise. Sure, he'll sell a few thousand tickets and might be a good motivator, but the days when the ability to gee up the lads was enough are gone.
The overwhelming likelihood is that he will fail, or at least get nowhere near his achievements as a player, so why do so many fans still want him to return?
The memory can only be tarnished. Earlier this season the jobs at Derby and Nottingham Forest became available at roughly the same time, and there was plenty of talk that Nigel Clough would take one of them. I wanted him nowhere near the Forest job for a number of reasons, largely because his status can only fall. For the same reasons, I never want Stuart Pearce to return.
By welcoming Shearer back with rapture and open arms, Newcastle fans are inviting their memories and hero to be destroyed, and what's the point in that?
I should mention that there are obviously some sensible Toon fans out there, so I'll leave the last word to a friend of mine who, when asked for his reaction, said: 'Picture me sitting at my desk massaging the bridge of my nose with my fingers, eyes tightly shut and slowly shaking my head.'
Nick Miller
Your Comments
the_pom_from_aus
"what did shearer win in all his football career, 1 premier ship with Blackburn, what did he do at Toon."Nothing" at all maybe not his fault on that score, but who in the right mind would go back to Toon when he could have joined either man utd or Liverpool to win everything. Is this the brain of a winner, he won nothing at all, so please don't feel sorry for his pathetic foot balling decisions.
He shall get what he deserves when the Toon go down, as like others he shall then walk away with a massive pay packet.
"
markc1728
"Yeah Keane did a bang up job. Southgate is top draw too. The top six clubs in the Premier League are all managed by men with bags of experience. The only one who is doing well in his first job is Zola, and Steve Clarke has plenty of influence there. If Dowie has the same sort of influence it could work out ok though.
On a side note - is a messiah not technically a deity in any case? (If you believe in that cack)"
Javier
"Guardiola at Barca, Klinnsman at Germany, Van Basten at Ajax, Roy Keane at Sunderland. No coaching experience needed.."
BubbleGooner
"I've been told by a few people that the north-east is good for shopping, and now I'm really looking forward to the Newcastle clearout sale this summer, when prices go down with the club. Gutierrez and Bassong will do nicely, methinks..."
sofaking
"I'll reckon this will end badly. I'll be putting a few quid on the Toon to go down. Why do they need three managers? "
nandothekid
"Oh... Where do you start? What a stupid decision. Ashley is just attempting to gain popularity with the fans, like he did with Keegy, and it could end up in ye going down. It's depressing that, even with such an amazing fanbase, Newcastle is becoming a laughing stock. The owner wants out, the manager has never managed before and your star-player is a crock who is winding down and counting the days until he can breed horses full-time."
jawn_jawn
"Newcastle for the drop"
monkeybeater
"im not a Newcastle fan but im quite excited. Its good to see a legend like Shearer in the stadium rather then the studio.
I honestly hope he does well.
"
antoD3
"THey all have experienced backroom staff. Shearer brought in Dowie"
gobias
"antoD3: Guardiola at Barca. Klinnsman at Germany. Van Basten at Holland.
It works both ways. Pointless to make assumptions based on unrelated incidences"
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