16.44: That Samuel Eto'o deal looks in jeopardy once again reportedly because he is demanding over £5m in compensation from Barcelona. They might have to do the deal with him and pay an eye-watering £65m for Zlatan Ibrahimovic.
15.54: Right, here's a story that would have been laughed out of F365 Towers a couple of days ago, but After Sven most things are possible.
Arabian Business.com is reporting that Diego Maradona (yes, that one) is willing to join Portsmouth (yes, that one) in some form of sporting director role.
The website - which you may remember first broke the news of ADUG's takeover of Manchester City and subsequently made a horrible f**k-up of the Kaka to City story - claims to have seen e-mails from Maradona's lawyer - one Angel Oscar Moyano - which says the wee man is willing to help bring players to the south coast.
The site reports: 'Moyano says that Maradona wants to help build a strong team "for which he offers his mediation for signing players of top level [sic] who with the support of Diego Armando Maradona, will be ready to come to Portsmouth FC."
'He adds that "he's got all top players ready and even he's [sic] ready to leave Argentine National team."
The website also claims the names of four players were in the e-mail, but annoyingly doesn't pass those names on, and backs up their watertight story by claiming Pompey's new owner/chairman Sulaiman Al-Fahim knows Diego's cousin.
15.37: A cautionary tale for those who think bigger is better (careful now).
Tim Borowski has returned to Werder Bremen, a mere year after leaving for Bayern Munich amid promises of milk, honey and all the Bratwurst he could eat.
The midfielder described his year at the Allianz as 'curious'.
15.22: Moussa Sissoko, one of the latest midfielders to be dubbed 'The New Vieira' (presumably on the basis that he's big, French and black) has apparently caught Tottenham's eye, but he's keeping schtum about the whole shebang.
"I am flattered by those links, but, to be honest, president (Olivier) Sadran never said anything to me yet about any bid" he said.
"For me, I will play for Toulouse until something is said to me. I am happy here and going abroad is not in my mind yet."
15.16: A summer never goes by without some low-level speculation about Eidur Gudjohnsen returning to England in some capacity, and the man himself has been speaking, and he said....oh sod it - just click here if you're interested.
15.14: Sylvain Ebanks-Blake has signed a new contract at Wolves. That's about as exciting as the news gets at the moment alas.
14.50: Breaking news from Spurs - 'Arry has wrapped up the signings of the confusingly similar Kyles Naughton and Walker from Sheffield United.
14.33: There's been some speculation that Bolton would make a move for Damien Duff around lately, but someone has had a word in the ear of the Manchester Evening News, and told them 'No dice, skipper'.
14.22: There was some gossip around this morning that Everton want Nedum Onuoha chucked in with the potential Joleon Lescott move to Manchester City.
Well now the boys over at Sky Sports.com have been deep throating (not that kind - dirty boys) and tapping up their contacts and have come to the same conclusion.
13.36: Word from Italy now, and Tuttosport are reporting that AC Milan want to buy Nicklas Bendtner after a move for Luis Fabiano apparently fell through.
13.01: Why, when football managers trot out the old line about not wanting to unsettle other players, do they not just stop talking?
Alex McLeish has dismissed suggestions that Brum are about to sign Stephen Hunt. Sort of.
"'It's not true. I am not about to sign anybody at the moment. We've got to count our pennies" he told RTE Sport.
"I don't really want to talk about players who are with other teams or I might get into trouble with the authorities."
Which was the point where he should have simply shut up. But he didn't.
"But Hunt is a good player."
Ah.
12.55: All slowing down a little bit now, isn't it? Here's something of minor interest.
Alex Hleb was supposed to be part of the deal taking Zlatan Ibrahimovic to Barcelona, but it seems like nobody has told him just yet.
"Hleb will leave with the team on the flight to London where Barcelona will play a friendly," his agent Maurizio Guadino said.
"No-one has talked to us yet about Inter, the two clubs are in talks and so at the moment Alex is thinking about working hard for Barca."
11.20: Sunderland want Villa midfielder Nigel Reo-Coker after hitting a brick wall with Lee Cattermole, it says on the Daily Mail website.
11.13: Done deal ahoy. Bjørn Helge Riise (brother of) has joined Fulham for an undisclosed fee from Lillestrom. He looks just like his brother only blonde.
11.06: Pompey boss Paul Hart has admitted they have turned down a bid - rumoured to be from Aston Villa - for Sylvain Distin, and insists that the Frenchman is staying at Fratton Park.
10.44: Joy of joys for Hull City for there is a striker who wants to join the club. The bad news is that it's Marlon Harewood.
"Marlon would certainly jump at the chance to join Hull City and the club knows that," his agent told the Hull Daily Mail.
09.43: Our good chums over at Sky Sports.com are reporting that Liverpool are about to give whipper-snapper Daniel Sanchez Ayala a new contract at Anfield. Exciting times.
09.36: Speculative bulls**t from the Manchester Evening News now, who report that United are planning a bid for David Villa.
The paper 'reports': 'The United manager knows he is well behind Real Madrid and Barcelona in the queue of top clubs lining up for the Valencia striker. Chelsea and Liverpool are also hoping to lure him to the Premier League.
'But Fergie believes there is the chance of nipping in ahead of his rivals after learning of Villa's increasing frustration over his failure to find a new club this summer.'
All this despite Villa stating on a number of occasions he doesn't want to leave Spain (which the MEN acknowledges but dismisses) and despite Fergie claiming he won't be spending any more this summer. Although we'll believe that on September 1.
09.28: 'Arry Redknapp really doesn't know where the press get these crazy ideas from about him signing players.
We've got a reasonable idea, and you probably have too.
Still, he hasn't the foggiest where those dastardly gents of the press got the idea that he might be interested in signing David Beckham.
Could it possibly be from the numerous occasions on which 'Arry has declared Becks a 'triffic' player? Surely not.
09.23: It would be stretching it rather to describe this as good news for Boro fans, but Mido has finally graced Gareth Southgate and his chaps with his noble presence.
Wouldn't put much money on him being there in a few weeks though.
09:14: More interesting stuff from Italy now, and Corriere dello Sport are reporting that suits from Manchester City were in Rome last night to politely enquire about Alberto Aquilani.
Keen blog readers will remember that he was strongly linked with Liverpool yesterday, if/when Xabi Alonso does one to Real Madrid.
Meanwhile, the chaps at Lazio are clearly keen opportunists, as they have collared the City chaps and asked if they'd be willing to chuck Valeri Bojinov, officially the World's Unluckiest Footballer, their way, what with them having one or two other strikers and all.
09.10: Quotes from Marouane Chamakh now, and a move to England looks pretty well on the cards, but where to?
Speaking to L'Equipe, he seemed to suggest Sunderland are very keen, but he's holding out for a slightly more glamourous move.
"I am ready to wait until August 31, because nothing is certain with Arsenal, contrary to Sunderland," he said.
"I can also play in the Trophee des Champions [with Bordeaux in Montreal, Canada at the weekend] to please everyone. But Bordeaux want a quick answer, which I cannot give them at this time.
"The most advanced contact is with Sunderland. Though for some it is not a very big club, bring it on. I know this may be a step and it is my wish."
09.08: Reports in Italy are suggesting that Samuel Eto'o has indeed agreed a deal to move to Inter Milan, shaking on a contract worth around 10million Euros a season, and with a bonus of 2million Euros for every trophy won by them. Nice.
09.04: The Gossip Column contains word of an apparent £17million bid from Spurs for Alvaro Negredo, and now we have some quotes from his agent that could back that up.
"We have had several offers from the Premier League, but no deal has been finalised and we are still studying which is the best option for the player," said Alejandro Camano in the Daily Mirror.
"But also there are clubs in Spain who are interested."
09.02: As you may have spotted by now, Javier Mascherano's not exactly mic-shy agent Walter Tamer has been talking again, and he's unlikely to be getting many Christmas cards from Merseyside this year.
He said: "Barcelona is the easiest deal to set up as Javier wants to go to Spain. He is tired of life in England.
"His wife has not been given a permanent visa. She has to go through an odyssey each time she wants to go.
"Liverpool refuse to sell, this can be overcome with an extraordinary offer."
08.45: The Gossip Column is here for your reading joy, and it contains all the latest on how Liverpool seem to be losing all their midfielders.
08.15: An update from a deal in progress now, and Samuel Eto'o's agent reckons a deal is close to take him from Barcelona to Inter Milan.
08.06: Morning all. Let us kick off with a quick line you might have missed from last night, and newly confirmed Portsmouth manager Paul Hart claims the club have received no further offers for Peter Crouch, who turned down a move to Sunderland yesterday.
