Everyone on this list is either free or available for less than £2m. We might not like Filthy Lucre Neill or Jermain Pennant, but we'd certainly take them for nowt. And then there's the former EMO...
10) DIDI HAMANN (FREE)
He's been strongly linked with a move to 1860 Munich but the German midfielder who turned the Champions League final has been busy telling Sky Sports this week that he thinks he can do a job in the Premier League. At 35, he's not going to be a box-to-box option, but a calm presence in the middle of the park might be just the ticket for Hull or Burnley. Failing that, Football365's Forest fan Nick Miller reckons he'll make a mess of his chair if he opts to drop down to the Championship to join a certain team with an illustrious history.
9) SOL CAMPBELL (FREE)
Although it seems likely that Sol will fulfil a lifelong ambition to play his football on foreign shores, that's what he said just before he joined the very English Portsmouth in 2006. His legs might have let him down towards the end of last season but he could be a decent 20-game-a-season bet for a team needing a cool head. The Pompey move re-ignited his career, and there's a chance that a switch to Aston Villa or West Ham could do the same again.
8) NICKY BUTT (FREE)
There's talk of Newcastle wanting to keep hold of Butt, but can Newcastle afford to keep anyone on the payroll in the Championship who earns £3m a year? There will be suitors for a player with over 15 years of top-flight football under his belt, even though Butt is now 34 and realistically only has two years left in his legs at this level. Wolves have been linked and you can certainly see the attraction, while Blackburn might see him as a successor to Tugay as an older, though rather less hairy, head in the middle of the park.
7) HABIB BEYE (£1m)
One of the few players who can walk away from Newcastle this summer with their head held high, Habib Beye has not only become a fans' favourite because of his song-friendly name, but because he genuinely put in the hard yards for Newcastle over two very difficult seasons. He says he'll happily stay but Newcastle are unlikely to turn down a million for a 31-year-old and the likes of Sunderland, West Ham, Stoke and Hull should be very happy to take a very good right-back off their hands for a pittance.
6) BENJANI (£2m)
Remember back in January 2007 when we all loved Benjani - 12 goals to the good and played the game with a massive grin on his face that almost made you want good things to happen to a Harry Redknapp side. He joined Manchester City in a late, late deal allegedly made later by the Zimbabwean falling asleep at the airport. Surprisingly, he only cost an initial £3.87m, with more paymenmt due to Portsmouth after 25, 30 and 75 games. Interestingly, Benjani has played 21 times so City will likely take some money and run rather than keep him around to cost more cash - they have a striker or two around to take up the slack. Don't be surprised to see Benjani back at Pompey.
5) SYLVAIN DISTIN (£2m)
One of the most consistent centre-halves outside the Big Four over the past five or six years, it's said that the Frenchman turned down Chelsea and Liverpool for first-team football at Portsmouth. That was an understandable move at 29, but at 31 he might want to make a different decision if the big boys come calling again. He would be a perfect fit for either club, who both need a Premier League-ready, auxiliary defender to replace the departing Sami Hyypia and Ricardo Carvalho. The fact that he can also play at left-back could come in rather handy too.
4) LUCAS NEILL (FREE)
We might call him Filthy Lucre Neill and still gape in awe at the ridiculous decision of rejecting Liverpool for more money at West Ham, but we have to admit that he's a very decent right-back (and auxiliary centre-back) indeed with eight years of solid if unspectacular Premier League appearances under his belt. As long as he's not expecting £80,000 a week, at 31 he'd be more than worth the investment of a two-year contract. Chelsea have been linked but we fancy that Everton might look at Neill and say 'hmmm, he's a sight better than Tony Hibbert'.
3) JERMAINE PENNANT (FREE)
You don't have to like him to appreciate that he would be a cracking free signing for a mid-table side, and at only 26 there's always the chance that he'll fulfil his potential, look very good in an average side, and you can sell him on for a tidy profit in a year's time. It worked for Birmingham. Ish. He will be slightly harshly filed under 'Liverpool flop', but anyone who watched the 2007 Champions League final will testify that he wasn't always floundering out of his depth for the Reds. For someone like Sunderland - and supplying someone like Kenwyne Jones - he will look quality.
2) MICHAEL OWEN (FREE)
This one comes with a massive 'if', and that 'if' is a pay-as-you-play deal that means the man previously known as EMO only gets his moolah if he can drag his fragile arse out on the pitch. A record of less than 80 games in four years tells you exactly why Newcastle fans resent £110,000-a-week Owen, but a record of 29 goals in those games indicates a strike rate of better than one in three. That's a ratio on a par with someone of Jermain Defoe's calibre and it's a ratio worth a certain kind of contract at a club looking to finish in the top six. You know we're looking at you, David Moyes.
1) RUUD VAN NISTELROOY (£1.25m)
Yes, he'll be 33 and there are several question marks opposite the word 'fitness' on his virtual resume, but this is a striker who has scored 232 league goals in 384 games for his five clubs, with close to a phenomenal two-in-three record in the two strongest leagues in the world. When fit he is a goal-scoring machine, so any club who can talk him down from his £90,000-a-week wages will have themselves a bargain. He might not play 40 games a season, but when 25 games can reap 15 goals, who cares?
Sarah Winterburn
Your Comments
KevEFC
"I really hope Moyes sees this list, he would most certainly ''make a mess of his trousers'' (been laughing for about 10 minutes). There's a few more out there, I heard Sean Davis is available on a free too? And why can't Damien Duff do a decent job for a mid-table side, one of the few Newcastle players to actually look like he cared on the final day last season, and at one point was top quality.
I'm sure there's a few at 'citteh' who will want to be playing regularly too (Michael Johnson, Onuoha, Ben-haim, even Bellamy in time too).
Portsmouth will definitely want more than 2m for Distin though, and i'm not sure about Owen to add to our injury prone Saha, Vaughan and Anichebe front line, they'll get 20 games between them max.
I'd love to see Van Nistelrooy at Everton though, even Jermaine Pennant could put a few good crosses in for Screech to get his perfected perm onto."
Doofus
"Saviola is number 11... Gudjohnsen has to be up there as well, both quality forwards and both for cheap money... If you can call 6 million pounds cheap..."
boltzmann
"WHATZ THE FATE OF MAN UNITED! LOST C-R7 AND TEVEZ IN A SEASON, WHO TAKE UP THEIR POSITIONS? FEGY SHOULD DO QUICK AND LET US BE HAPPY AGAIN!"
ZombieNinja
"Its true that Distin is a great player but why would Portsmouth sell him for a mere £2 million? Have the sales of Johnson (£17m), Diarra (£20m) and Defoe (£15m) not taught you that Pompey only sell their players for more than they are worth. You may as well have said that Peter Crouch is going to Bolton for £500,000. "
stuart_jambo
"Hi just a wee comment on the RVN thing. He would be a great signing for just about any club in the world how happy i would be to see him in a liverpool shirt nxt season even if it is warming the bench. Probably the best goalscorer iv seen in the time iv watched football, hardly ever injured would be a great coup for any team. Also the signing of Glen Johnson gives us more competition for RB and RM. Unlike our rivals we have lost none of our top players this year and are only getting stronger. One top class forward in the team (RUUD VAN NISTELROOY) read this rafa no hints!!!!lol and this will be our best chance to win the league!!!!."
YoungBlue09
"Show David Moyes Or Sam AllaDyce This List And They Would Make A Mess Of Their Trousers "
promanager
"I think wesley sjenider should be on that list . He is a great player who plays well at the top level . clearly not going to play in the squad real madrid are building and could go cheaply . same with van der vaart . i think sneider and van der vaart wud be lethal at arsenal and it wud help arsenal play the football they like to play asthey wud have a triangle of great passers and distraburos of the ball in fabreags and sneijder and van der vaart and wud also give them the stability in midfield they so desprately need . it wud help out nasri and walcott to . "
rexbarlez
"Nizm and IrishKopite there are 3 of us now. RVN would be a cracking buy and I suspect he would like nothing more than to put one over on old bacon face after the cloud he left under."
thomas0071
"in my opinion i think that bun9 is correct in that manu should buy RVN because he left because of a bust up with ronaldo and now ronaldo has most certainly not returning to OT then Manu need a decent goal scoring."
Nizm
"IrishKopiteMkI - I'm the second Pool fan to think that RVN would be a very shrewd purchase - not a first teamer but in terms of quality off the bench he would be even better than Owen. P.S. Love your confidence fella - 'majority of one'? Ha ha!"
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