Awful, awful stuff on the new Manchester United man. Plus, England for the English and more...
They are in full-blown crisis - even though they can 'only' spend £100m while Liverpool 'splash the cash'.
Kylian Mbappe follows Philippe Coutinho on Instagram and plays as Liverpool on FIFA. The deal is done.
How have Man United only signed more players than literally half of the Premier League so far?
Well obviously they are both greedy and lazy, according to one very well-paid Mail journalist. Plus, white privilege...
The MEN would definitely not pretend Ronaldo is coming. Oh and Man United should sell Paul Pogba; that'll show him.
See if you can guess what Man United's 'transfer advantage' over Chelsea is. It's an absolute mystery.
Poor Dan James has barely been at Man United a day and he's already being shipped out.
Let's all pretend that Manchester United used to be able to sign the biggest players in the world...
Did you think Gareth Southgate liked TAA? You were wrong; he's given him a kicking.
Cristiano Ronaldo had better be ready for some Man United 'wrath'. And HERE COME THE BAPS.
Virgil van Dijk paid for sick children to have a Christmas party. How can you boo him? And Barkley = De Jong.
Klopp is about to be bloody homeless JUST DAYS AFTER the CL final. And Sterling apologises (for someone else)
Well, somebody at the Mirror. Plus, how Liverpool would look with new signings and 'less than 72 hours' rest...
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