Why Arne Slot is WORSE than Ten Hag and yet somehow loads better

Editor F365
Arne Slot and Erik ten Hag
Arne Slot and Erik ten Hag

There’s a massive rush to get Erik ten Hag and Arne Slot in the same headline so here we are too…

 

Slot machine fail
Our expectations on all matters Liverpool from The Sun are lower than a snake’s belly but this is particularly hideous:

Incoming Liverpool boss Arne Slot’s record in Holland WORSE than Man Utd boss Erik ten Hag with head-to-head revealed

They’re calling these the BALD FACTS (because they’re both bald, you see) and you cannot argue with the FACTS, can you?

And the FACTS are that Slot’s record in the Netherlands (not Holland because it’s not the 1980s) is WORSE for the man who has managed the third-most successful club Feyenoord than for the man who has managed the Dutch giants of Ajax.

In other shock news, the records of Roberto de Zerbi and Thomas Frank in the Premier League are WORSE than Erik ten Hag. So we really can’t fathom why Ten Hag is under any pressure at all at Manchester United.

But back to The Sun:

With Slot seemingly destined for Anfield, fans won’t be able to help but compare his record in Holland with Ten Hag’s.

And Reds supporters won’t like what they see.

They will largely be able to ‘help but compare’ because they are largely not idiots who realise that they would not be comparing like with like.

The Sun admit that Ten Hag had ‘an arguably easier job at perennial champions Ajax’ (you think?) but reel off a whole heap of statistics that will obviously hit Liverpool fans hard.

They they ‘reveal’ the pair’s head-to-head record – available on all good football stats sites – which is annoyingly even.

And they mate not face off again any time soon should Slot come to Anfield, with Ten Hag edging closer and closer to the sack.

They mate not indeed. And The Sun mate not ever get a sense of propriety when it comes to Liverpool.

 

Slot > Ten Hag, innit
‘Robin van Persie’s decision to snub Erik ten Hag for Liverpool target Arne Slot speaks volumes’ is the hot take from the Mirror. Was Van Persie not aware of Slot’s WORSE record? The fool.

Obviously the implication is that he believes that Slot is a better manager than Ten Hag…

Although reigning champions Feyenoord aren’t expected to retain the Eredivisie title this year – as they trail PSV Eindhoven by nine points with only four games to go – Slot’s reputation is a distinguished one. Almost Dutch champions with AZ Alkmaar before the 2019-20 season was declared null and void, runner-up in the Conference League with Feyenoord in 2022, and finally winner of the Eredivisie last season, there’s a reason why a certain Robin van Persie wanted to learn from him.

He’s a good manager, alright.

Rewind two years ago and the now retired former Manchester United striker was being tipped for a return to Old Trafford, with the Red Devils having just appointed Erik ten Hag after his tremendous spell with Ajax. Ten Hag offered him the chance to part of his coaching staff but Van Persie made it clear that he’d prefer to stay in the Netherlands.

That’s because while managing boyhood club Feyenoord’s under-18 and under-19 sides, Van Persie is also involved in Slot’s first-team training sessions and gets a first-hand look at a ‘disciple’ of Manchester City boss Pep Guardiola. Van Persie shares the same principles, so opted to remain among his Rotterdam roots.

Let’s have a look at what Van Persie actually said at the time about that decision:

“My son and daughter are important right now. The fact that they have both found their passion is great. A hobby is nice, but you hope that they really find a passion.

“Dina succeeded in doing that with horse riding, she’s totally into it, and Shaqueel has the same thing with soccer. My wife, Bouchra, is developing all her talents with our projects and that’s great to see. We’re enjoying ourselves together.

“In London, when I played at Arsenal, we moved five times. We also lived in Manchester and Istanbul. All in all, we were away for almost fourteen years.

“But then we thought ‘what’s good for the kids now?’ and felt a little stability would be nice.”

So Robin van Persie’s decision to ‘snub’ Erik ten Hag for Liverpool target Arne Slot really did ‘speak volumes’…about his love for his family and desire for stability.

 

Bald men fighting over a headline
Obviously, the gold is in getting the names of Ten Hag and Slot into a headline so…

”A ton of problems’ – Erik ten Hag and Arne Slot truth clear as Liverpool set to follow Man United path’ – Manchester Evening News.

The ‘truth’ that has become clear is that Ajax had “a ton of defensive problems” (according to Andy Brassell) while “Feyenoord have pretty much the best defensive record in the Eredivisie and they have done over the last two seasons”.

Pesky fact: Ajax won the Eredivisie in 2021/22 with 19 goals conceded; Feyenoord won the Eredivisie in 2022/23 with 30 goals conceded; PSV are about to win the 2023/24 Eredivisie with a likely 18 or 19 goals conceded.

So that doesn’t really feel like the ‘truth’. It feels like an idea retro-fitted to Manchester United’s current struggles.

‘Arne Slot has already made Erik ten Hag feelings clear after rivalry with Man Utd boss’ – Express.

You will be shocked to learn that Slot said that Ten Hag was “doing great” with Manchester United when he was indeed doing great with Manchester United. So he really has made those feelings very clear indeed. More as we get it.

‘Liverpool dressing room has already been given telling Erik ten Hag comparison for Arne Slot’ – Liverpool.com

Quite why the Liverpool dressing-room would give a flying f*** how Slot compares to the Manchester United manager is unclear but what is clear is that they have been given a ‘telling’ comparison…by Oussama Idrissi, who started one Eredivisie game for Ajax in the season when they won the title in 2020/21.

Oddly, he preferred playing under the manager who gave him 17 starts in the season Feyenoord won the title. Bizarre. But crucial information for Virgil van Dijk and co.