Man Utd three times the patsies as every Premier League club’s best game of 2023 revealed

Chelsea didn’t even win their best game of a miserable 2023, while Man Utd’s put Newcastle in their box – for now. No prizes for guessing Liverpool’s…

Arsenal 3-1 Manchester United
Arsenal went from the despair of conceding what they thought was an 88th-minute United winner, to the joy of not only seeing the visitors’ advantage wiped out by VAR but stealing the game themselves, thanks first to new record-signing Declan Rice’s 96th-minute deflected strike, then Gabriel Jesus’ 101st-minute finish after sending Diogo Dalot to the shop for a paper. Bournemouth at home was fun too.

16 Conclusions on Arsenal 3-1 Manchester United: Rice, Ten Hag cowardice, Havertz, Hojlund, Onana

Aston Villa 1-0 Manchester City
Villa have been going great guns all year but the arrival of City at the start of the month was seen as the litmus test for their prospects this season. Unai Emery’s side were brilliant from back to front, out-shooting the Treble winners 22-2, and Villa Park rocked, especially after Leon Bailey’s deflected second-half winner earned them a record-equalling 14th home league win in a row.

It’s little wonder they are top of the Premier League mood rankings.

Manchester United 0-3 Bournemouth
Much of the focus in the aftermath of a stunning away win for the Cherries was on United and how dire they were in defeat. But Bournemouth schooled their hosts, taking an early lead and controlling the game to the extent that the only surprise about their second goal was that it took so long. “I think we’ve just started clicking,” said Dominic Solanke, scorer of their opener. Indeed. That was their fourth win in a run of five undefeated.

Brentford 3-1 Liverpool
“What a night! I can’t praise the players enough,” said Thomas Frank after his side had bullied the Mentality Monsters, even without Ivan Toney, to record their first victory over Liverpool since 1938.

Brighton 1-0 Marseille
“I think this is the best moment of my time at Brighton,” said Roberto De Zerbi after the Seagulls won in the 88th minute to seal top spot in a group with OM, Ajax and AEK Athens. So we’re certainly not going to argue, even if there have been a few performances that push this Europa League triumph close.

Blackburn 0-1 Burnley
Clinching the Championship title in your derby rivals’ backyard with your only shot on target? Doesn’t get better than that for Burnley in 2023. “What it means for the people of Burnley to come and win the league at Ewood Park, for us, you couldn’t write it,” said Vincent Kompany.

Chelsea 4-4 Manchester City
The only game on this list that isn’t a win sums up how wretched 2023 has been for Chelsea. But against City, inspired by Cole Palmer, they showed signs that a brighter future lay ahead on “an amazing evening,” according to Mauricio Pochettino. Then they went to Newcastle and undid much of that good work. 

Leeds 1-5 Crystal Palace
Roy Hodgson’s first game back against Leicester, a 2-1 win in the dying stages, was a doozy but his second, a come-from-behind battering of relegation rivals Leeds, was even better. Four goals in the second half eased the Eagles relegation fears, with the job Hodgson was brought in for effectively done inside a fortnight.

Everton 1-0 Bournemouth
There have been plenty of positive performances of late and the 3-0 demolition of Newcastle was a big contender here. The win over Burnley made one Evertonian want to cry. But for sheer relief, the final game of last season, when they escaped relegation again with a slender win over Bournemouth, comes out on top. Even with a 10-point deduction, they won’t let that happen again this season.

Fulham 5-0 West Ham
This was the second 5-0 victory at home inside a few days, the Hammers going the same way as Forest in midweek earlier this month. “To control a team like West Ham in the way we did was almost perfect,” said Marco Silva.

Liverpool 7-0 Man Utd
You can’t tw*t Manchester United for seven – the biggest ever win in this fixture – and pick any other game. It was close at half-time, with Liverpool leading by only the one goal which came just before the break. Then they blew the Red Devils away only a week after United’s best game of the year. So we can’t really blame Erik ten Hag for parking the bus on Sunday.

Luton 1-1 Coventry (6-5 on pens)
Reaching the top flight for the first time in 31 years through the anguish of penalties, just nine years after dwelling in the National League and 12 months after screwing up the last play-offs, can’t be topped, even if they had held on to beat Liverpool last month.

Manchester City 1-0 Inter Milan
Treble? Completed it, mate. It was actually a fairly dour game, and they had Romelu Lukaku to thank for fluffing his big chances, but as their neighbours will agree, who gives a f*** if you don’t perform in a Treble-clinching final as long as you win.

Manchester United 2-0 Newcastle
United won a trophy this year and they did so in impressive fashion, foiling all Newcastle’s enthusiasm for their first pot in 427 years, to win with a performance full of control and authority. So they can do it.

Newcastle 4-1 PSG
No trophy for Newcastle yet and no European football after Christmas, but the pummelling of PSG will live long in the memory of those there at a raucous St James’ Park to witness Kylian Mbappe pocketed by Dan Burn. The build up to the Magpies’ first Champions League game at home in two decades had the feel of a final and Eddie Howe’s team fed off the energy from the stands. The win, though, sent Howe’s brave boys top of a group they would finish bottom of.

Nottingham Forest 1-0 Arsenal
Forest’s win over Arsenal crowned City champions – not that Pep Guardiola’s side were on the hosts’ mind as they celebrated survival with their most popular manager since Brian Clough. Steve Cooper will always have Arsenal when he’s cleared his desk for Nuno.

Sunderland 1-2 Sheffield United
The first win back under Chris Wilder was big but beating the Black Cats was a turning point in the Blades’ promotion charge.  Weirdly, Barcelona star Ousmane Dembele was at the Stadium of Light to watch Paul Heckingbottom’s side come from behind and recover their composure from a wobble that had prompted them to lose four of their previous seven.

Tottenham 4-1 Newcastle
Speaking of wobbles, Spurs had a massive one after flying out of the traps under Ange Postecoglou. So impressive had the Aussie’s start been, he was insulated from four defeats by his own popularity and an injury crisis. To mark the end of that rotten run, Newcastle arrived in north London and were played off the park.

West Ham 2-1 Fiorentina
Champions of Europe and a first major trophy in 43 years… Prague played host to a generational triumph, let alone the best of 2023.

Wolves 2-1 Tottenham
Beating City was impressive but Gary O’Neil was ‘most proud’ of November’s come-from-behind, stoppage-time victory over Tottenham. The visitors led without really deserving to as the clock ticked over into the 91st minute. Pablo Sarabia levelled with a stunning volley before Mario Lemina sent O’Neil down the touchline with a 97th-minute winner.