Five trivial Ten Hag targets for a Man Utd man on the edge
Erik ten Hag was a figure of authority for Manchester United last season. Finally, someone in charge at Old Trafford able to make the tough decisions. Cristiano Ronaldo sent packing. Harry Maguire stripped of the captaincy. David de Gea deemed surplus to requirements.
And that hardline approach has continued this term, with Jadon Sancho its most significant victim, but many members of the squad complaining about it at one time or another, as is their wont.
But whether because of an absence of deserving targets for censure, or because Ten Hag is slowly losing his marbles along with his solid footing at Old Trafford, he now appears to be picking fights with the most inconsequential of enemies – both fictitious and real – deemed to have slighted him, his team or one of his players, no matter how trivial the supposed criticism.
Manchester United managers drawing focus away from their teams through such exploits is nothing new. Sir Alex Ferguson was something of a master of it. But while Arsene Wenger and Rafael Benitez were significant and worthwhile adversaries, we’re not sure Erik ten Hag vs Fulham’s social media team will prove to be quite such a battle for the ages.
We’ve found five Ten Hag targets in 2024 that suggest he may not be long for Manchester United…
Press conference reporter
“Yeah, but you didn’t believe me. No one. I have seen all your briefing but it’s not my job.”
What did the press conference reporter supposedly not believe? That Manchester United would be “stronger” when their injured players returned to action, apparently.
Now, we didn’t see the “briefing” Ten Hag’s referring to, nor do we know for sure if said reporter did indeed doubt whether having more and better players to choose from would improve United, as the manager claimed ahead of the January transfer window.
It may well be that a journalist or two were skeptical over the benefits of the return of Luke Shaw, Casemiro and Lisandro Martinez to the squad – though they would have to pretty daft – but for Ten Hag to claim that “no one” believed him is quite something, and speaks to this misunderstood genius role the Dutchman loves to cast himself in.
Kobbie Mainoo and Alejandro Garnacho doubters
“I brought Kobbie Mainoo and everyone is questioning. Now… same people telling he has to go in the England squad. Garnacho, same. ‘What is the manager doing? What is the staff doing?’. Similar.”
This is the perfect example of Ten Hag entirely fabricating something to big himself up as a misjudged luminary. Far from “everyone questioning” his selection of Kobbie Mainoo, we’re not sure anyone was. At just 18 years of age he’s proven beyond any reasonable doubt that he’s Manchester United’s best central midfielder, and it seems as though people were pretty convinced by his brilliance from day dot.
Gary Neville said “he looked like a Manchester City player” after his full debut against Everton, in a game that prompted us to claim Ten Hag had uncovered his very own Frenkie de Jong.
Maybe Ten Hag’s issue is that he’s not received the credit he deserves for putting trust in these young players? And he may have a point, but it could just as easily be argued he didn’t really have a choice. Antony or Garnacho is a no-brainer, and there wasn’t a huge amount of bravery required in selecting a teenage midfielder when a) he’s so obviously excellent and b) he can run while the alternatives can’t.
Manchester United recruitment
“The club has bought an unimaginable number of players in recent years who have not been good enough.”
Quite possibly comforted by being interviewed in his homeland, Ten Hag spoke very openly in January about the state of Manchester United before his arrival, bemoaning the lack of a “fear factor” surrounding this once great club, rooted in their shoddy recruitment. It’s hard to disagree with his sentiments – their work in the transfer market had been laughably poor.
But it was a bold statement from a manager who’s spent close to £400m in two seasons at Old Trafford and doesn’t have a huge amount to show for it. It was particularly bold given at the time of the interview Rasmus Hojlund was just one game into the six game hot streak which now has most people conceding he may actually be a smart acquisition.
Andre Onana has had a decent season, but they wildly overpaid for him, as was the case with Casemiro, who was very good, then very bad, and now just fine. The club is yet to see any return whatsoever on the £55m spent on Mason Mount, Lisandro Martinez was God awful before being sidelined by injury this term, and Antony is well up there among the worst signings in Premier League history.
Jamie Carragher
“Some analysts are very objective in their comments, very good advice, some are very subjective. Jamie Carragher, from the first moment on, has criticised and now he wants to make his point.”
Carragher claimed United “defended like a side I have never seen before” against Fulham, playing with a low defensive block and a high attacking press. And Gary Neville said his “heart sank”, as he didn’t think the manager of Manchester United should stoop to respond, though that uncomfortable feeling was presumably accompanied by an air punch or two as Monday Night Football got a much-needed shot in the arm.
Punditry is subjective by its very nature, a point incontestable after a weekend in which Neville labelled Chelsea “billion pound bottlejobs” for losing the Carabao Cup final to Liverpool. But it was an odd time to question Carragher’s integrity given he was analysing actual footage of the United defeat, and even Ten Hag subsequently admitted he “had a point”, so quite frankly we’re at a loss as to what his point of contention is.
Fulham’s TikToker
“I see social media criticising him. It is pathetic. He had a serious injury but he continued to play on Saturday and then also he fought to be part of this game. He has a very high pain threshold.”
Ironic that the actual manager of Manchester United refers to social media criticism of Bruno Fernandes as “pathetic”, in the process admitting that he both keeps abreast of the online taunts and gives a shiny sh*t about them.
We’re not sure what’s worse: Ten Hag doomscrolling for ammo for his next press conference or United’s own social media employees keeping him in the loop. In any case, bringing it up after an FA Cup win over Nottingham Forest and ahead of a Manchester derby doesn’t entirely convince that reporters are in the presence of a guy with his head in the game. And there was more.
In direct response to Fulham’s tongue-in-cheek video mocking that warrior of warriors Fernandes for feigning injury in United’s defeat to the Cottagers at the weekend, Ten Hag said they were “totally out of order” and should “apologise” for their scarcely incendiary “so glad he’s OK” caption.
An overreaction made all the more gratuitous by the fact that 99 per cent of people now aware of Fulham’s mockery of the brave Manchester United captain would not have seen it were it not for Ten Hag’s intervention.