Jurgen Klopp for England? Two reasons why he might take the job…
‘He might like the hours. There’s no need to live all the time in the country.’ And that’s it apparently. It’s basically nailed on.
But first, a different Jurgen has a crazy-assed idea…
Substitute teacher
In a way, Mediawatch admires the grift. On the back page of The Sun – dominated by the news that Thomas Tuchel would like the England job (which is a safe punt because he wanted it before) – is the headline:
‘JURGEN: ENGLAND MINDSET WAS NOT RIGHT’
Now, hands up if you immediately thought of Jurgen Klinsmann. That would be none of you. Even Jurgen Klinsmann himself would think that The Sun had somehow got hold of some Jurgen Klopp quotes.
As for the column itself, the standard fare about England’s mindset was clearly deemed too dull for clicks so the online headline is far sexier:
Jurgen Klinsmann calls for major rule change to bring best out of England stars after Euro 2024 final loss
And then it absolutely turns out that he’s a lunatic who thinks Harry Kane should have played through the fact that he was quite clearly absolutely f***ed and blames ‘Covid rules’ for making players think that they are tired.
Apparently ‘players like Bellingham and Kane are capable of getting through those “tired” moments and winning big matches’ and ‘the leadership of Bellingham and Kane is so huge, even if in a moment they are down to 80 per cent, who cares?’.
If you ask a player after 70 minutes, “Are you tired?” then I’m sure he’s tired but it becomes a handy excuse now because of that five-subs rule.
It’s a Covid rule and Covid is finished. I’d go back to three subs and 23-man squads for tournaments.
And that, ladies and gentlemen, is the ‘major rule change to bring best out of England stars’.
Does anybody want to tell him that England only used three subs in the final?
MORE ENGLAND REACTION FROM F365
👉 16 Conclusions on England losing the Euro 2024 final: Southgate out, Kane abysmal, Rice poor, drop Walker
👉 One ‘terrified’ and ‘comical’ England player sums up the Southgate era
👉 Dunk to Guehi via Kane, Bellingham and Watkins: Ranking all 26 England players at Euro 2024
The likely lads
We suspect that the Daily Mirror‘s John Cross is a very, very tired man after weeks in Germany because his back-page story on the England manager situation is what happens when you ask a man to do one more piece before his holiday.
This is the actual opening line:
FA chiefs will not be short of candidates to become the next England boss.
Now that takes insight. And contacts. Only somebody with years on the England beat could know that there will be several candidates for one of the biggest jobs in international football.
Apparently, the FA ‘have drawn up a succession plan with a strong list of potential managers which is likely to include Newcastle boss Eddie Howe and former Chelsea and Brighton boss Graham Potter’.
It’s certainly ‘likely’.
And ‘they would also almost certainly talk to England under-21 boss Lee Carsley’. It would seem off if they didn’t.
We are then told that ‘former Chelsea boss Thomas Tuchel is likely to be interested’ and that Gareth Southgate’s decision is ‘likely to take some time’ (erm….).
It’s likely that you should have just let the man have his holiday.
Howe could he be ignored?
There is some magnificently obvious news dominating the back pages on the subject of a possible new England manager with the Daily Mail saying Eddie Howe is ‘among the leading contenders’, the Daily Telegraph claiming he is ‘among the frontrunners’ and The Times saying he ‘would be a leading contender’.
English managers finished 7th, 14th, 15th, 18th and 20th in the Premier League last season. If the man who finished seventh was disregarded by the FA, it would be bordering on gross negligence.
Klopp of the list
But what about the man who finished third? There is a growing movement for the FA to try and recruit Jurgen Klopp.
The problem is obvious. As explained by The Guardian‘s Jacob Steinberg: ‘There have also been calls for England to approach Jürgen Klopp but the chances of the former Liverpool manager wanting to take over seem remote.’
They do indeed ‘seem remote’, what with Klopp being determined to take a break from football (he literally turned down an approach from the USMNT just days ago as ‘he reiterated that he would like a break from football’, according to the all-knowing David Ornstein).
But less than four hours after Steinberg dismissed the chances of Klopp taking the England job, his Guardian colleague Barney Ronay lands this hot take:
The FA’s task when Gareth Southgate goes is simple: get Jürgen Klopp
‘Simple’? Hmmm. It would be literally the biggest coup any national association had ever managed to pull off.
Oh and as a general rule, if your opinion is the same as Richard Keys’, get another opinion.
The wonderful thing is that Ronay clearly does not believe this ‘simple’ task is actually possible.
Klopp might not want it. He must surely have competing plans. He is perhaps too big for the job. But he would be absolutely perfect.
Four sentences, three of which dismiss the idea that Klopp would take the job. The fact that he would be ‘absolutely perfect’ is absolutely irrelevant. Mediawatch has had several ideas about who would be our ‘absolutely perfect’ wife, but we have instead found a degree of happiness with our own Eddie Howe.
There is a suggestion the FA may not be able to afford Klopp on the current budget. Come off it. The England team made between €5m and €8m from reaching this final. Spend it on a proper manager. Get a bespoke sponsor. Get Tesco to pay for it.
The FA have many commercial partners. But none of them are Tesco. We’re not quite sure why Tesco would come on board to pay Klopp the £15m a year he reportedly earned with Liverpool. But Ronay knows that and he’s just being Ronay.
Klopp is, like Southgate, a culture builder, a process guy. He has the warmth and charisma to recharge the stage. He’s like Southgate’s cooler, taller, much more successful cousin. But he’s also a proven elite modern coach. Klopp is also Total Premier League, has nurtured English players, has understood and progressed the tactical culture. He might like the hours. There’s no need to live all the time in the country. Let him wear a baseball cap. Make it work.
In return England have a settled culture and good young players. What they need is warmth, fun and energy, plus that degree of coherence and in-game control that has proved to be just out of Southgate’s reach. In many ways Klopp is almost too good…
We’ll stop you there, Barney, because this seems like the most pertinent point.
If your most compelling argument for Klopp taking the job is that ‘he might like the hours’ then, like Steinberg says, ‘the chances of the former Liverpool manager wanting to take over seem remote’.
It feels like everybody needs a holiday.
MORE ENGLAND REACTION FROM F365
👉 16 Conclusions on England losing the Euro 2024 final: Southgate out, Kane abysmal, Rice poor, drop Walker
👉 One ‘terrified’ and ‘comical’ England player sums up the Southgate era
👉 Dunk to Guehi via Kane, Bellingham and Watkins: Ranking all 26 England players at Euro 2024
