Man Utd ‘horror show’ accused of ‘violating human rights’ as Liverpool fan ‘pities’ Ten Hag ‘disaster’
The Manchester United ‘horror show’ has the club accused of ‘violating human rights’, while a Liverpool fan predicts the outcome of Arne Slot’s debut season.
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A sympathetic Liverpool fan pities Manchester United…
I have reached the worst stage that I think a Liverpool supporter can reach, from the perspective of a Manchester United supporter: pity and sympathy.
I mean, who knew that Ten Hag would likely be a disaster this season? Well, pretty much everyone. That they chose to extend his contract – and with it, presumably the inevitable pay off – is completely unhinged. He had a year left. He had lots to prove within that year, and it was hardly likely that another club was going to swoop in and tempt him away, or indeed, that we would walk away in 2025, having had a great season. The time to extend it would have been around January, in the unlikely scenario that United were doing quite well.
The FA cup win – as lovely and unexpected as it was – was a terrible thing for the club, because now they have another wasted season, a load more money spanked on this manager’s plan, and then the inevitable period of transition after they finally do get rid of the current manager. And of course, this period of transition could be exactly the same as the last five periods of transition. It probably will.
Manchester United has become an unsolvable mystery that would stump the collective minds of Poirot, Marple and Holmes.
I see posters like Garey Vance and Bad Wolf losing their sh*t and reason, and I can see from their output that they are probably very decent humans, yet with every published letter, they get slightly more cracked and irrational, and this is what supporting football clubs do to us when they fall apart, and I can’t help but sympathise that their happy place is so corrupted and broken.
But of course, I am also a football fan, and this schadenfreude is a part of the deal, so I am enjoying United’s travails, but as a Liverpool fan, I also understand what it feels like. This United is similar to the “Spice Boys” era of Liverpool. Talent in the squad, a cup run (or cup) here and there, but with a soft centre. I suppose that the difference is the Spice boys thing happened near the start of Liverpool’s fall from grace. In the following years, we had the (sh*ttest possible but still a) treble, Instanbul, a few close misses, but plenty to enjoy (but downs as well as ups). Even now, with the club running well, there aren’t great expectations this season, but the club and team is still very healthy.
United are sick all over. Sh*t owners, dilapidated stadium, new messiah who is making questionable decisions, disjointed, expensive squad paying terminally underachieving players a king’s ransom to stink the place out, and a manager who, in his third year, still has no discernible style of play. It’s a complete horror show.
My advice to the Gareys and BWs of this world is to step back and find some other flowers to smell. I am not suggesting that they should forsake their club (this is akin to abandoning children) but find another happy place for your wellbeing and sanity.
Mat (Villa win? Great, more turmoil. United win? Great, more Erik.)
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Seven stages of grief
In conversation with my Arsenal supporting mate across the world, we agreed on two things: 1. To meet midpoint (ish) in Emirates for an Arsenal vs Man United match with our kids and 2. United is probably looking at another decade of mediocrity.
And it just hit me, I have just reached the last stage of grief – “Acceptance”. I had high hopes starting this season but as I had written earlier just after a couple of games, they just don’t look like a team. We can argue about tactics, coach, players, owner, etc. but the bottom line matters and it is that we are a mediocre team. And I finally accept that. I will celebrate what I can, which is the occasional cup trophies and the odd top four finishes.
Shivam, MUFC, Singapore
Man Utd silliness…
We’re all loving the continuing Man United catastrof*#%, of course we are, and I’d never dream of complaining about it – like many of your contributors, I grew up in the 1990s and 2000s, with a United-supporting brother boot, so this is still hilarious and delightful to me.
As much as I’m anticipating the frenzy in today’s Mailbox, though, I’d love to get some proper, informed perspective.. At various points in the tenure of Moyes, Van Gaal, Mourinho, Solskjaer, Rangnick, and now Ten Hag, we’ve been assured that this is truly the worst, the most despicable, the most shameful, that it’s been. Could we get a relatively sane United fan, ideally with a functioning memory, to put all of these dreadful spells into perspective for us?
Is Ten Hag really worse than Moyes? Did Van Gaal and Mourinho actually play decent football? Maybe the Solskjaer thing really was idiotic? I’m getting a bit bored of United always being at their lowest ebb (or rather, the noise about them being so), so could someone let me know what the real lowest ebb has been?
Yours, etc.
Ciarán, Walkinstown
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Are Man Utd violating human rights?
I initially started writing this as a joke, but is Manchester United an actual human rights violation? The amount of money they waste could feed a decent percentage of the world’s population facing famine and disease. I get the argument that all frivolous hobbies could fall under this argument, but nearly every other team actively tries to bring joy to people albeit with differing levels of success. It’s obvious to anyone watching that the owners aren’t interested in providing joy, which I think is the bare minimum if you’re not going to do more to help the world at a more nuts and bolts level. More than any other team, I think Manchester United fans should only buy one kit this year instead of two or three, and go to the World Food Programme to donate some cash.
It won’t be a waste of money like the 200 million spent just a few months ago. Forget responding that I’m trolling you. I’m bloody serious. You’re wasting your hard-earned money on a team that wastes its money to fulfil some strange ambition that only tax accountants and bankruptcy lawyers could understand. Go do something good with your money instead of spending it on Manchester United because that’s the only way they emerge from this sh*tstain period. It’s not the owners, it’s not the manager, it’s not the players. It’s not the former players. It’s you. You’re the problem. You’re doing more to hurt the world than Manchester City and their 115 charges.
Niall, Annapolis
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Liverpool expectations…
I enjoyed Will Fords article ‘Five reasons for caution as Liverpool fans despite record-breaking Arne Slot start’, because as a Liverpool fan & son of that fine city (best place on this planet) before I emigrated to Quebec some time ago, it summed up nicely how I feel about LFC right now, and what I expect from this season.
We have started well, with good results. From what I am able to see from here, we are not always playing spectacular football, but this is to be expected I think with a change of manager & basically all of the backroom staff. It is a different style of football – we wont be mauling Man Utd 7-0 anytime soon, but an away win at Old Scaffold 0-3 is more than just fine!
We are one of only six teams to win both of our opening Champions League games. I agree with everything that F365, and other sites, have said about this new format being shite, but never the less….
Do I expect Liverpool to win the Premier League…no I do not. Do I expect Liverpool to win the Champions League…maybe, but because I still don’t understand the format f*** knows. An FA or League Cup, I think we have a pretty fair chance there.
So I expect a fairly comfortable top 4 position and a return to the Champions League next season, a decent run in the Champions League this season (with an outside chance of winning it), and maybe an FA Cup or League Cup. We will also resolve the Salah / Van Dijk / Alexander Arnold contract situation, one way or the other so people will stop bleating about them all the time.
And in my opinion, will be OK, in my opinion, given the change we have gone through just now. C’est compris as my Quebecois family & friends may say.
A, LFC, Montreal (My Quebecois family & friends would not say C’est compris, but until you become QuebecoisFrench365, I have to roll with it! I only have a grade C French GCSE!)
READ: Liverpool made two of the five best Premier League decisions this summer
Contradictions being taken seriously…
I’m no fan of MUFC but their travails have been a great opportunity for pundits to defy logic and generally enjoy themselves and waste everyone else’s reading time. We’re told that MUFC are missing a leader, a Roy Keane, and that they need a captain who doesn’t know how not to get sent off?
Bizarre.
Bock – Dublin
Red cards for crap corners
Hello fellow readers. This has been annoying for so long I think I finally have the solution.
What annoys me? Elite professional footballers not being able to beat the first man when taking a corner.
The solution? Straight red.
Phil AVFC
The Diarra ruling
Well, not quite sure what the outcome of the recent EU decision that FIFAs rules contravene EU employment laws – but it is funny how these epochal changes happen with lesser known or forgotten players and lower order teams.
Not a FIFA fan, the opposite actually, so nice to see them get their nose bloodied. However, when you go through the possible outcomes of this decision, it could mean the wealthiest clubs can convince any player to up sticks and join them, no matter what their contract says.
Ironically, from what I have read, this started because Locomotiv Moscow wanted to break their contractual agreement with the player – Diarra – and pay him less because he was a bit sh*te. Yet decided Diarra should be responsible for the transfer fee related incompleted portion of his contract. Then wouldn’t release him to the club he wanted to join without paying the €10.5m and FIFA withholding the transfer approval.
Point is, isn’t the issue that Locomotiv Moscow was at fault originally for a) trying to alter the player agreement and pay him less and b) equating the issue to a transfer fee the player has no control over? In other words, should this have even reached this level?
If any player can breech their contract at will, it means no contract has any value. While the Bosman ruling was long overdue in wrestling the absolute control a club had over a player, will this go too far the other way? And, again, why wasn’t the Locomotiv Moscow held to account for their original attempt at screwing over Diarra or was it just Diarra’s lawyer convincing Diarra he can make a name for himself the same way the lawyer did it for Bosman (same lawyer)? After all, Diarra had retired.
I am sure this will rumble on for quite some time. Just surprised at how quickly it came up.
Paul McDevitt