Mikel Arteta aims ‘cheeky’ dig just weeks after his ‘rampage’ as Garth gets it all wrong

Arsenal are top of the table by eight points despite having a lunatic in charge who is forever aiming ‘cheeky digs’ and such like…

Under pressure
Amazing that Mikel Arteta and Arsenal somehow kept their calm less than two weeks after the boss went on a ‘rampage’ as they proved they were feeling the pressure at the top of the table.

It’s almost like that was all utter bollocks.

The big questions
From the BBC:

‘Alan Shearer column: Why Arsenal are in control of the Premier League title race’

Is it because they are eight points clear?

Small-time Crooks
Garth Crooks is obviously ready to give Arsenal some credit, which is hard for a former Tottenham man. He includes three Arsenal players in his BBC team of the week, including Ben White:

‘This Arsenal side is unrecognisable from the team I saw begin the season. The back four now play as a unit and have stopped giving away stupid free-kicks in dangerous areas. This looks like a team that has found itself and means business. We all thought it might be Tottenham’s year but that couldn’t have been further from the truth.’

Arsenal won their first five Premier League games of the season.

‘What has captured my attention is Arsenal’s new-found professionalism. Mikel Arteta is far more controlled in the technical area and there are clear signs that the league leaders refuse to be rattled by minor incidents and distractions. It’s enough to make you start taking Arsenal very seriously.’

It’s less than two weeks since Mikel Arteta attracted some considerable flak (see above) for his behaviour and literally less than a week since Arsenal were charged with failing to control their players. Keep up, Garth.

Elsewhere, Crooks includes Emiliano Martinez in his team of the week:

‘The 30-year-old doesn’t seem to have been affected by the criticism that has been levelled at him since his Qatar antics, which included throwing the ball away and attempting to unnerve Aurelien Tchouameni during that epic penalty shootout in the final. Martinez was also pictured holding a toy baby with a mask of Kylian Mbappe during his country’s celebrations in Buenos Aires. Boys will be boys.’

Did he perhaps miss something?

And on Luke Shaw…

‘I said when Luke Shaw played in the centre-back role against Bournemouth recently that he was inspirational.’

Luke Shaw played at left-back against Bournemouth.

‘Shaw’s recent displays for Manchester United must be an inspiration to youngsters all over the country who are desperate to play at centre-back but have been told they are not big enough.’

Luke Shaw is 6’1″.

But for all the facts Crooks wilfully ignores, we have to applaud him for including Marcus Rashford in his team of the week just to make the point that ‘the offside law as it stands is no longer fit for purpose’. Somebody give the man a proper column so he can retire his crowbar. No, that’s not an offer.

Inside job
Arsenal beat Tottenham 2-0 on Sunday to go eight points clear of Manchester City at the top of the Premier League table, but if you think that dominates online football media on Monday morning then you are a damned fool.

Obviously The Sun website goes for the ‘Shocking moment Tottenham fan KICKS Aaron Ramsdale after Richarlison lashes out at Arsenal star’ line, which makes the whole thing sound rather more violent than it was. But hey, it’s not every day that a fan kicks a footballer so we can at least understand the distraction. Even though we personally prefer football. We’re so mid.

It could be worse; they could be merrily pretending they have any inside knowledge of the Mykhaylo Mudryk deal like the Mirror website, who remain utterly shameless.

‘FOLLOWING MYKHAYLO! Inside £87m Mudryk’s first day at Chelsea, from his Stamford Bridge arrival to an unusual announcement and the offer Arsenal could not match’

Do they follow him? Do they go ‘inside’ anywhere with him? Did he actually cost £87m?

No, no and thrice no but as usual, f*** the facts because why linger on those when you can pretend you have been shadowing Mudryk like an offside Marcus Rashford with a football.

Going ‘inside’ his first day apparently means noting that he was at Stamford Bridge and that the club announced his arrival on their website during the win over Crystal Palace.

And, well, that’s it.

And as for the ‘offer Arsenal could not match’…

‘It will take something rather special for Mudryk to justify a total financial commitment that was almost double what leaders Arsenal were willing to spend.’

As the Mirror themselves told us three days ago that ‘Arsenal have now submitted an offer of £62m plus add-ons, which would take the overall deal to around £70m’, what devil maths takes double that amount to £62m rising to £87m?

Cheeky beggar
To the untrained eye, Arsenal manager Mikel Arteta was quite sanguine about missing out on the signing of Mykhaylo Mudryk, saying he backed the club having some “discipline” and emphasising that he is happy with his Arsenal squad, though “we always want to improve the squad and the club always tried to improve players”.

But to the trained eye of a Trends Writer with football.london?

‘Mikel Arteta aims cheeky dig at Chelsea spending spree when quizzed on Mykhailo Mudryk transfer’

A ‘cheeky dig’ at Chelsea without mentioning Chelsea, is it? It’s definitely on trend.