Rethinking the Club World Cup, loving Jonathan Pearce and enjoying the Euros
John Nicholson is very much enjoying Jonathan Pearce and the start of the Women’s Euros, but a change of heart over the Club World Cup might be necessary.
People crop up in unusual places. I downloaded the UEFA app because I had nothing better to do last Friday. I enjoy the dusty end of football’s fretboard and I found France U19 women playing Spain in the final of their Euros on this app.
Who do you think was commentating? One of my favourites, Jonathan Pearce, who has commentated on women’s football since 2013. And my God he came armed with a huge amount of statistics and info and he deserves praise for his enthusiasm even though this could hardly be called high profile.
France looked knackered and were passed off the park by a Spanish side who played the same classy way as all Spanish teams play and won 4-0. It was their fourth consecutive win. Enjoyable game.
I have had a bit of an intellectual reverse ferret about the Club World Cup after listening to Tim Vickery and Conor McNamara talking about it on 5 Live. They pointed out how important it was to regions like South America, Africa and the Middle East and how they saw it as very validating to play in and to measure up to ‘Western’ teams and also to show off their best players. Perhaps we shouldn’t be so snooty about it.
Qualification for entry is still not transparent enough and it asks players to play without a proper break. The financial rewards definitely skew the domestic leagues but that being said, thanks to Tim, I could see from the Brazilian point of view it was a chance to show how good they are and promote their own football. And who are we to sneer at that?
Maybe they could fit it in better across an extended season. There must be a way to accommodate it in more conducive weather. And although the European sides are not taking it quite as seriously, European desires and perspectives are not the only ones to exist. The fact Infantino is such a dictator toady and is craven to a range of despots and abusers doesn’t help the situation, of course, but I shall try to have a more open mind, hard as it is.
For the round of 16 game of Palmeiras v Botafogo there were needless cliched references for one of the Brazilian sides to “samba into the next round” from commentator Pete Odgers, who does tennis more often, I think. A tight game, it went to extra time. Palmeiras were the better side throughout, though Botafogo were never really out of it but just struggled to make chances until the second half of extra time, when they should’ve scored but instead lost 1-0.
They play the winner of Benfica v Chelsea, presented by a cool, studious-looking Ade Oladipo who I’ve not seen before and very much enjoyed. Alex Aljoe does the interviews in a compact way and after each one, as the manager exits, she immediately looks off-camera presumably at a producer, as if to say ‘was that alright?’. The camera never cuts away quickly enough not to catch it.
It’s a boring first half played out in near silence, Chelsea dominated to little effect. Conor sounds low energy and bored on commentary and disengaged.
In every game is a banner dishonestly pleading to us for a ‘free upgrade’ – free only for a week of course, then it’ll cost you. They must think we’re stupid enough to pay if you think it’s too blurry, want HDR and want to hear the minimal crowd noise in surround sound. Such bad business practice. The adverts are full of grotesque Trumpian-styles lies and exaggeration, like ‘stadiums flooded by a billion colours’. I mean how many colours do empty plastic seats come in? It’s horrible. Just be honest and transparent. You seem really dodgy by not being. This tournament has had the unwanted side-effect of inspiring us to ignore DAZN’s pleading for money. We don’t need these liars. It’s an upgrade that is frankly pointlessly pishing a pricey £24.99 per month away to be lied to every month. It flashes up regularly, often obscuring the action. Seems amateurish and very desperate.
The U21 final was a triumph. Channel 4 must have been delighted for the extra viewing figures it brought. It was a Sven tribute. First half good, second half not so good and included a desperate last-ditch defending display that could have been England in any era. Unable to keep the ball and coming under increasing pressure? It’s in our blood.
But it was a Carsley sub that won it and he had instilled a resilience to the side. No-one could argue he isn’t rather good at this tournament lark. He’s signed up for the gig until 2027. Maybe he’s found his role, one he feels comfortable with. He may work best as a coach beyond the lighted stage, out of the spotlight, of course, and he shouldn’t be forced into a first-team role if he doesn’t want it; it’s certainly not an upgrade, but show me a provably better international tournament manager?
Of course, he may not have the tools to control the first team’s rampant egos and the requirement to play Harry Kane despite him losing both legs in a threshing accident. He’s seen them up close and might think he got away just in time before they ruined his career.
England played Jamaica in a pre-Euros friendly. It was on ITV and it was Laura Woods’ turn to wear the presenter’s hair extensions, and Karen’s turn to wear the pundit’s. More facile nonsense in the ad break from Google Pixel. They really have cornered the market in patronising garbage. Embarrassing. A 7-0 win was one-sided and the King Power pitch looked patchy.
For Flamengo v Bayern, Shay and Kleberson were joined by a scrubbed up Rafa Honigstein who looked uncharacteristically smart, presumably there for Bayern insight. Earlier PSG had beaten Inter Miami 4-0 in the round of 16, so hopefully that’s the last of the Messi slavering we’ll see unless they somehow inject him into future games, which wouldn’t surprise me.
There’s a good Thomas Muller section. Roberto Martinez is there in a pale grey or white suit which looked like a hostage to a post chilli-dog digestive explosion. Flamengo’s energy seemed to force Bayern into making a proper effort, which was a bad idea because it meant they won 4-2 in a match that was adjacent to being proper.
Danny Higginbotham was the co-comm (he was called “legend of the game” which I’m sure is news to Danny). He was very articulate and looked big and ripped. I used to like him but he disappeared for a while. He seems to live in America now, perhaps he works for US TV.
Wilf Zaha is interviewed. How quickly we forget about high-profile people once they leave England. He looks a bit intimidated and struggles. I think it’s too hot for him. Now 32, he has surely made, for some reason, some poor choices in the last few years. His talent should surely be on a higher stage even now – then again, he’s only been in double figures for goals three times in the Premier League and the highest was 15, the other two were just 10 and 11, so maybe his reputation is bigger than his achievements. The move to Turkey didn’t really work out and he was on loan at Lyon and now Charlotte.
Kleberson seems a cheerful sort with fluorescent teeth. Inter v Fluminense was a particularly sparsely attended huge stadium even with half closed off. Inter were a bit toothless until late and the Brazilians won 2-0. Later Manchester City lost to Al-Hilal and given Pep’s previous comments and that they’ve already pocketed nearly £40million, it’s hard to think they care at all. There’s a fine line between throwing a game, playing badly and not busting a gut to win and City certainly walked it at times, as you’d expect.
Edgar Davids was in the DAZN studio on Tuesday, looking very stately. I wish he had a big fat doobie on the go for his glaucoma. Real Madrid v Juventus from Miami was given the big build-up that it inevitably wouldn’t live up to. Decent crowd for a change. Trent in midfield. What does it mean? Who cares? The upgrade prompts every two minutes are really annoying. It doesn’t seem to concern them that it often obscures the action. But I suppose football is of no concern to them. At half time they played the ‘upgrade now’ dishonest ad four times in a row in one break, three in another and once again before the second half, presumably all due to lack of other adverts. What a hateful channel.
Madrid won 1-0 but it was quite boring. More like a glorified training game really. No-one looked in the slightest bit happy and the thought football is supposed to be fun seemed the furthest thing from anyone’s mind. Infantino was there, sitting in a stupid big padded chair with a head like a boil. As a spectacle it was dispiriting beyond measure.
The opposite in fact from the Euros, which kicked off in Switzerland on Wednesday. The most high quality, competitive one yet. ITV will have wanted a more high-profile game than Iceland v Finland to open their coverage. But it’s hard fought. A good-sized ground is full in the excellently-named Thun. So much better than a quarter-full enormo dome.
The contrast in styles between this and DAZN’s is marked. Far less flashy, presenters with normal clothes on, not going full Hollywood and everyone doesn’t have to wear the channel’s badge or say “I’m looking forward to this one”.
Finland had most of the ball and won by the odd goal. Meanwhile on the BBC, they were launching their coverage with home nation Switzerland taking on Norway with one of their ‘I’ve been working on this for ages’ animated opening sequences. Exciting opening package of goals to the Go-Go’s We Got The Beat. Fara Williams, who I love, says ‘Gells’ in a welcome strong accent. Beautiful, very moving piece about 2022. These programmes on both channels compared to DAZN’s gold toilet-style coverage should make us really appreciate what we’ve got, despite the right-wing anti-BBC swivel-eyed cabal who run most of the press trying to turn us against them.
Nedum Onuha expresses himself well as does Ellen White, who has a severe parting in her hair. Good interview with the English coach of Norway, Gemma Grainger, who appears powered by Yorkshire tea.
The opening ceremony was as daft as usual and involved the synchronised waving around of big silver pipes. Why do they bother? Get tae tha’ fitba.
The Norwegian anthem was sung breathily, like the opening titles of a Scandi noir drama. The Swiss one is more Germanic and stout. Norway, though favourites, were sluggish and the Swiss driven on by the 34,000 home crowd took the lead but in a fascinating game Norway scored two and missed a penalty as Switzerland had a penalty VARed off for an offside boot which gained the player zero advantage. The poindexter’s wet dream.
Switzerland really should have equalised. Norway were not impressive but won 2-1. I really enjoyed the program with Ellie, Fara, Nedum and Gabby. It was pleasingly free of facile comment and was good natured.
Life intruded on Thursday with the heartbreaking Diogo Jota news. Hard to carry on in the face of such a shocking thing. It inevitably makes us all face our own mortality and the random Godless nature of existence. Life is fragile and can change for us all in a heartbeat. It’s not a nice thought and scary, but it is our lot and we can’t change it. What else can you do? Go to as many churches as you like, it won’t and never has changed.
Jeanette Kwakye presented Belgium v Italy on the BBC. I’ve not seen her before. She was with Steph Houghton, Nikita Parris and Nedum. They struck a nice, humane tone as you’d expect from everyone except Fleet Street. Vicky Sparks and Izzy Christiansen did the comms. An uneventful and quite low-key game that Italy won.
There was a respectful downbeat opening from a pleasingly dressed down Laura Woods for the Spain v Portugal game. The whole thing oozes class with pundits Caroline Weir and Vicky Losada. The whole thing seemed really well-judged in a very difficult situation charged with being forward looking but not too excitable. Good interview by a cool-looking Seb Hutchinson who correctly identifies an Egyptian Goose and Fran Kirby who is promoting nature moments with WWF.
Emma Byrne and Seb do the comms. A 30,000-strong crowd saw Spain race to a 4-0 half-time lead and that ended it as a contest. They were a different class. 5-0 eventually. The programme ends quite quickly which is to be welcomed. It was a sad end to the week.