Kane, Henry, Van Nistelrooy (courtesy of Veron) among 10 glorious pre-season goals…

Ian Watson

Some big names and a lad who once played for Paderborn feature among these incredible pre-season goals. We have backheels, chips, volleys, halfway-liners, volleys from the halfway line…

Enjoy, in no particular order, these jaw-dropping moments of friendlies madness.

Andreas Pereira for Manchester United v Brentford, 2021
The last thing Andreas Pereira did in a Manchester United short was arguably his finest moment. Such a shame it was wasted on a pre-season friendly against Brentford…

Really, after tw*tting in a ripsnorter from 30 yards in front of the Stretford End, Pereira should’ve continued running and headed straight down the tunnel all the way to Flamengo, where he spent a year prior to being sold to Fulham. Which is working out very nicely for the Belgian-born Brazilian. .

 

Yossi Benayoun for Chelsea v Wycombe, 2011
One off the training ground… literally.

Which is a shame because Benayoun’s magic deserves a far wider audience than one man and his dog and Cobham. It also warranted a far grander description than ‘this cheeky finish just crossing the line’.

If Benayoun did that at a sold-out Stamford Bridge, the Chelsea TV anchorman would have been reaching for the Kleenex. And that would be the appropriate response.

Another interesting facet to the video: John Terry at least trying look like he’s listening to Andre Villas-Boas.

 

Thierry Henry for Arsenal v Weiz, 2004
Similarly, it’s a shame only 2,500 were present to witness this Thierry Henry filth…

This was only the three minutes into a 5-0 win for Arsenal, which is awful early to be sending his defender for the papers.

And the finish… never has a goalkeeper tried so hard while remaining so far from reaching a ball.

 

Oscar Rodriguez for Real Madrid v Man City, 2017
As a Real Madrid player, you probably shouldn’t really celebrate pre-season goals. You certainly shouldn’t celebrate consolation goals when you’re 4-0 down in the 90th minute.

But we’ll allow Rodriguez this indulgence since it was the one single thing he did in a Real shirt. The midfielder managed a single Copa del Rey appearance before being sold to Sevilla.

The ball rebounding back way, way out of the net and the ‘clang’ off the goal frame also adds to its unique appeal.

 

Marcel Ngjeng for Paderborn v Bolton, 2015
“The best goal I’ve ever seen in my life,” was how Bolton boss Neil Lennon described this piece of ridiculousness from Ngjeng for the Bundesliga 2 side in their 4-1 win over the Trotters.

Normally, with any goal scored from the centre circle, one of the first reactions is to question the goalkeeper’s choice of lead boots. But there is literally nothing that Ben Amos could have done to prevent one of the sweetest volleys you are ever likely to see from a lad who’d just been released by Hertha Berlin.

 

Harry Kane for Tottenham v Juventus, 2019
This was a more traditional halfway-line hit, if there is such a thing. A friendly, yes, but to chip an Arsenal goalkeeper in added-time to beat Juve makes this “one of my best” according to Kane. And there have been bloody loads.

 

Xherdan Shaqiri for Liverpool v Man Utd, 2018
This isn’t even the best bicycle kick Shaqiri has scored. Compared to his stunner for Switzerland at the Euros, this was a mere tap-in…

But it’s still a thing of wonder. And if there’s a perfect way to introduce yourself to Liverpool fans as a new signing, it must surely be scoring an overhead kick in a 4-1 win against Man Utd, even if Pereira bagged a beauty in that game too. The pre-season Pirlo indeed.

 

Filippo Inzaghi for AC Milan v Barcelona, 2010
If you were wondering where before you’d seen Robin van Persie’s incredible for Man Utd against Villa in 2013, it would be here, with Clarence Seedorf in the Wayne Rooney role…

 

Ruud van Nistelrooy for Manchester United v Juventus, 2003
Juan Veron and Ruud van Nistelrooy teaming up for Fergie at Man Utd should have been a link-up for the ages. Alas, we saw moments like this, against Juve in New York in 2003, all too fleetingly…

 

Stevan Jovetic for Inter Milan v Real Salt Lake, 2016
If Inter were playing in Serie A and drawing 1-1 in added-time, would Jovetic have done this? We doubt it, which is why pre-season friendlies, when they aren’t a waste of time, are bloody brilliant.

F365 Features Andreas Pereira

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