Ronaldo rescues ‘Ralf Rangnick’s bizarre-looking reign’

Editor F365
Ralf Rangnick and Ronaldo

Well done Cristiano Ronaldo, for motivating the young kids while simultaneously acting like one yourself.


Do Ron Ron Ron
After spending weeks painting Ralf Rangnick as a failure of a Manchester United manager (one defeat in nine games), The Sun are not about to give up the ghost now, especially when his players were ‘Man Utd flops’ as recently as Wednesday.

Over to Dave Kidd, who somehow credits Cristiano Ronaldo – and not Rangnick – with motivating Manchester United’s young players despite acting like a man-child himself on Wednesday night at Brentford.

‘Perhaps his most valuable work had been carried out in a TV interview in which he’d suggested United’s younger players needed to listen, to learn and to man up.

‘He told them they must look at themselves in the mirror with pride – which is easier to do with a physique like Ronaldo’s, but they understood his gist.

‘Because three of United’s Academy products – Anthony Elanga, Mason Greenwood and Marcus Rashford – scored second-half goals to settle a match which they had threatened to lose during a dismal opening period.’

So Ronaldo’s words did not motivate them against Aston Villa on Saturday night and they did not motivate them in the first half against Brentford on Wednesday night but they magically worked in the second half just after Rangnick had spoken to them. Well done, Ronaldo. You are somehow managing to organise this rabble despite that nerd in the dug-out.


How bizarre!
Over on The Sun website, Jordan Davies warms to the theme of a terrible Manchester United with a piece about how David De Gea once again being the club’s player of the season is not a good look. True but what’s this headline?

‘Man Utd verdict: David De Gea being forced into Player of the Year form is a bad omen for Rangnick’s struggling giants’

Those ‘struggling giants’ have a record bettered only by Manchester City since Rangnick took over in the dug-out. They have picked up 14 points from seven games to put themselves just two points off fourth place. If Rangnick’s giants are ‘struggling’ then so are Jurgen Klopp’s Liverpool and Thomas Tuchel’s Chelsea.

Davies then refers to ‘Ralf Rangnick’s bizarre-looking reign’ and never explains that comment, preferring instead to pretend that a goalkeeper is not part of a team.

‘This is not a one-off. Take De Gea out of the United side this campaign and Ole Gunnar Solskjaer would not have lasted as long as he did. The top four may be out of sight by now.

‘Instead, they are within touching distance of Champions League football next season, not that anyone barring De Gea or Cristiano Ronaldo are of that quality anyway.’

Not Bruno Fernandes? And not four-times actual Champions League winner Raphael Varane?

That’s a bizarre-looking claim.


Dead Apprentice
How does The Guardian‘s Jamie Jackson – author of Ole Gunnar Solskjaer book ‘The Red Apprentice’ – report on Wednesday night’s events?

Ralf Rangnick was forced to explain to Cristiano Ronaldo why he was substituted after the forward questioned his decision during Manchester United’s 3-1 win at Brentford that Thomas Frank claimed was “unbelievably lucky”.’

He’s not hiding it, is he?


Silence of the lamb
Over on the Express website, there are reactions and then there are the reactions to the reactions.


‘Man Utd boss Ralf Rangnick reacts to Cristiano Ronaldo’s latest strop after Brentford sub’

And then…

‘Cristiano Ronaldo reacts after Man Utd strop at Ralf Rangnick in Brentford win’

The latter is fascinating because we learn that ‘Cristiano Ronaldo has broken his silence after his tantrum in Manchester United’s 3-1 win over Brentford on Wednesday night’. His ‘silence’, ladies and gentlemen, lasted a whole 90 minutes after the game before he posted the following on Instagram: ‘3 important points! Well done lads.’ 

And that is the biggest story in football.


Captain’s log
Remember this from the Mirror last week?

Ralf Rangnick’s captaincy order as Man Utd leadership group emerges after split’

They claimed that ‘Rangnick’s order of captain’s when Maguire is ruled out is to first turn to Ronaldo followed by Fernandes and De Gea’.

As we said at the time…even if we ignore the errant apostrophe, that’s a curious conclusion to make when Ronaldo has not captained any Rangnick game started by Fernandes and vice versa. 

Lo and behold, it was a crock of old shit.


MailOnline headlines are remarkable for their length – ‘Rio Ferdinand reveals he text Martin Keown demanding ‘what’s going on?’ after his BT Sport colleague named Diogo Dalot man-of-the-match over Scott McTominay for Man United’s win at Brentford’ is basically the entire story – and for their use of capitals. Sorry, CAPITALS.

So, this bright Thursday morning…

‘Ousmane Dembele is told to LEAVE Barcelona ‘as soon as possible’ after being left out of squad to face Athletic Bilbao… with director of football Mateu Alemany insisting he wants ‘committed’ players’


Football fan arrested for allegedly SPITTING at a steward during Tottenham’s remarkable comeback victory over Leicester in the Premier League – as dramatic win sparked wild celebrations

…but most wonderfully of all…

‘Ralf Rangnick reveals he watched videos of Anthony Elanga on YOUTUBE before working with him and thought ‘he was really good’ as interim boss says he blocked Manchester United starlet leaving on loan this month’

Utterly incredulous that he did not watch on DAILYMOTION.


Recommended reading of this and every other day