Mediawatch on Lukaku, Zouma (again) and Collymore whataboutery
The columnists are out in force today, with Romelu Lukaku still under the spotlight and Kurt Zouma-related contrarianism.
Mediawatch
Solskjaer aimed vicious ‘parting shot’ at ‘flops’ after ‘betrayal’
The Sun are adamant that the players carried out a ‘betrayal’ of Solskjaer against Watford.
Manchester United are ‘top of the league’ so shush…
Manchester United are top of the league so Ole criticism should stop. Oh and the wrong Ronaldo.
Ronaldo petrifies players and those Newcastle Nazis
Ronaldo is exactly like Winston Churchill because Newcastle are exactly like the Nazis…
Ronaldo, his poor mum and the traitorous Declan Rice
Ronaldo reduces his mother and Mediawatch to tears while Declan Rice is next ‘transfer masterplan’ target.
Ronaldo allows £73m man ‘under the radar’ apparently…
Jadon Sancho is allowed to be a bit sh*te because of Ronaldo, who will definitely be on the bench v Newcastle.
Have England become ‘The Harry Kane team’ now too?
Harry Kane can score a goal a game for England if he likes, but the media expect him to break records.
Can Ronaldo ‘adapt’ and ‘integrate’ at United by Saturday?
It’s the big question as the media is once again dominated by Ronaldo, who has been ‘noticed’ playing football…
Latest Ronaldo exclusive: ‘He could be on the bench!’
But first, Ronaldo could be forced to drive slower. There is just so much Ronaldo news around…
Southgate in ‘confusing’ Greenwood stance
Gareth Southgate has taken a ‘confusing’ Mason Greenwood stance and Pep Guardiola could copy his tactics.
Ronaldo, Ed Woodward and the great PR swindle
Forget ”funny, clever and engaging’, Ed Woodward is some kind of magician for making Ronaldo happen…
Liverpool suffer double squad blow as CR7 cardio questioned
Cristiano Ronaldo is a “killing machine” one day but when he joins Manchester United we speak of tired legs.
There can be no bad Liverpool news while Mbappe exists
The Liverpool Echo always has Mbappe to fall back on. But the MEN cannot make their mind up on United’s midfield.
Solskjaer and a ‘body of work’ that transcends trophies
Never mind trophies, never mind title challenges, check out Ole Gunnar Solskjaer and his 100 games.
But Ronaldo said he’d never play for Mark Hughes in 10th…
But Cristiano Ronaldo said he would “never” join Manchester City. In 2009. When they had just finished 10th.
‘Greedy’ Kane is hung out to dry by The Sun as Spurs lose out
The Sun have been in bed with Harry Kane all summer but now he is ‘greedy’ and solely to blame for everything.
Kane panic takes hold as Sun shoot at ‘frosty’ Nuno, Athletic
The Sun are scoffing at The Athletic using someone’s brother to get access. The Sun. The Sun are doing that.
One-handed column writing is hard and Arsenal are irrelevant
Arsenal are irrelevant, says full-page column in national newspaper. And that’s not even the troubling part…
Kane desperation continues as Jesus told to make £160m demand
Harry Kane is mentioned in the match reports for not one, not two but three games. The Sun are desperate.
Kane to ‘force’ Manchester City to raise bid after Pacos loss
Harry Kane is going to ‘force’ his Man City move. Martin Odegaard’s shirt number is bad news for James Maddison.
Tottenham ‘silly’ to turn down lowballing Harry Kane bids
The media is still dominated by Harry Kane, with The Sun calling Tottenham ‘silly’ now…
Will Leeds sack Bielsa and appoint Lampard?
Marcelo Bielsa did not emulate Brian Clough so he will have to make way at Leeds, according to Stan Collymore.
Kane circus continues as Grealish given worst advice ever
The media is still desperate to shift Kane on to Manchester City. And there is some awful advice for Grealish.
Guardiola panics over Kane; everyone ‘writes Liverpool off’
Liverpool have been ‘written off’ by 20 BBC pundits and the Echo is absolutely beside itself.
How can Chelsea solve all their problems by Saturday?
Chelsea have a lot of fixing to do before they face Crystal Palace on Saturday after winning the Super Cup…
‘HARRY HELL’ for Kane as Messi meets Liverpool…
Nobody knows hell like Harry Kane, stuck earning £200,000 a week at his boyhood club. The poor sod.
A Kane transfer plea and ‘Haaland transfer set’
Tottenham should just let Harry Kane go, while Erling Haaland is practically a Manchester United player…
Lukaku (cliches) return confirmed as Haaland ‘twist’ revealed
Lukaku is big. Lukaku is strong. Lukaku is not mobile. Lukaku is a flat-track bully. Is this 2019 again?
Man Utd ‘missed out on Grealish’, De Bruyne sold for Messi
Man Utd will be devastated at the ‘proof’ that they ‘missed out’ on a player they didn’t seem to want to sign this summer.
£26m Grealish disparity after Pep’s ‘pig-headed unwillingness’
Jack Grealish will be on either £200,000 or £300,000 at Manchester City. It’s a slight difference of £26m over five years.