Arsenal dismissed as ‘also-rans’ as Liverpool never fancied Martin Zubimendi anyway

We’ve got a new favourite way to describe runners-up, while there’s yet more good news for Manchester United and mavericks risking fans’ fury.

Echo chamber
Some truly magnificent saltiness from the Liverpool Echo today about Martin Zubimendi, who actually they definitely never fancied anyway so they’re not bothered he turned down Liverpool last summer only to join Arsenal this summer.

Martin Zubimendi makes bizarre claim after turning down £51m Liverpool transfer – ‘the best decision’

There’s a lot of feigned bewilderment at the idea Zubimendi didn’t feel ready to leave Real Sociedad 12 months ago but is more comfortable with it now, as well as indignant bafflement at the idea Arsenal gave PSG a tougher test in the Champions League than Liverpool (although of course he never actually mentions Liverpool here).

But our favourite bit is this.

While Liverpool were understandably displeased at the change of heart, they opted not to reinforce their midfield options and went on to dominate the Premier League under new boss Arne Slot and claim a record-equalling 20th championship.

Zubimendi has subsequently signed for last season’s leading Premier League also-ran Arsenal for £56m during the ongoing transfer window

Genuinely, we love that. We are going to start referring to all runners-up in all events in all sports as ‘leading also-rans’ from now on.

United! United! United!
The good news just keeps on coming for Manchester United, the club that can do no wrong right now.

Fresh from last season’s high-flying season in which they finished 14th leading Premier League also-ran, they are now busy absolutely aceing their summer tests.

Over to chief cheerleader Samuel Luckhurst in the Manchester Evening News for the latest…

Manchester United have got it right with their pre-season tour squad after two mistakes

Glory, glory indeed. What have they got right with that all-important pre-season tour squad?

There is no bomb squad in the 32-man Man United squad in the United States, which is another step in the right direction for the club.

Another step! Will the steps never stop coming? Only the deeply churlish would even think to suggest that an even better step in the right direction might be not, in fact, having a large unsellable bomb squad of players at all.

Paying the penalty
Lovely little bit of headline pudding-egging going on over at the Daily Express here as they bring us Italy’s response to last night’s Euro 2025 heartbreaker against England.

England Lionesses penalty complaint launched by Italy in major Euro 2025 accusation

Now this is a very deliberately worded headline designed to imply without quite explicitly saying a couple of things that absolutely are not happening.

First, ‘complaint launched’ is overtly suggestive of Italy looking for some kind of official avenue of redress, rather than what actually happened, which was a coach and several players being understandably distressed in the immediate aftermath of losing to a fairly soft penalty at the end of 120 minutes of drama and tension in which they had already been two minutes away from victory in normal time having largely outplayed the Lionesses.

As for the ‘major Euro 2025 accusation’ we can only guess what the Express are referring to here in the absence of an actual major Euro 2025 accusation.

Our best guess is this quote from Italy coach Andrea Soncin.

I’d be tempted to ask: would [it] have been called in the other area at that point in the match? I don’t know. It’s a penalty that could or could not be given because the holding was mutual and light.

When your ‘major accusation’ includes the words ‘I don’t know’ you might be guilty of being ever so slightly overdramatic.

The only other thing that can even tenuously be termed an ‘accusation’ is Cristiana Girelli hinting at refereeing standards not matching those of the players here.

I can say, when the level rises this much, you also need top-notch refereeing.

All Mediawatch would say here is that this constitutes an extremely generous assessment of England’s performance.

United front
When is Manchester United transfer news not Manchester United transfer news? When it’s Barcelona and Arsenal transfer news. From the Daily Star:

Man Utd transfer news: Marcus Rashford suffers setback after major Viktor Gyokeres update

The two entirely unrelated pieces of news here are that Barcelona can’t register Rashford until they offload some players – a recurring theme at Barca in recent years and absolutely nothing to do with Man United now his loan deal is complete – and that Gyokeres is going to sign for Arsenal as expected.

Fury road
The Daily Express indulge in some gentle poking of the North London bear with this headline.

Tottenham maverick risks fury of fans with astonishing Arsenal comments

Gets better, though. Because it’s not just the Arsenal comments that are explosive here, look.

Adel Taarabt has launched a scathing attack on former club Tottenham whilst confessing he regrets not joining north London rivals Arsenal instead.

Given he made 15 appearances for Spurs across three seasons before his place at QPR, Spurs fans might also wish he’d joined Arsenal instead.

Still, though, we all love a ‘scathing attack’ don’t we? What’s he said about Spurs then? This should be good.

My first choice that I think was not good was – not to sign for Tottenham, because Tottenham is a good club – but at that time I had offers to go to Arsenal and it was a more French club with Arsene Wenger and a lot of French players

A ‘good club’? You simply can not get more scathing than that.