Liverpool handed Marc Guehi ‘transfer update’ from unlikely source as injury list grows by three

All sorts of news emerging in this Carabao-laced midweek.

There are fresh updates on Marc Guehi, some shock news for anyone at Manchester United who hasn’t been paying attention, and Pep Guardiola saying something completely mad and over the top that, on closer inspection, he didn’t in fact say it all.

It could only be Mediawatch.

Knowing Me, Knowing You, Saha

Mediawatch is so very, very tired of this sh*t that we’re just going to rattle through this one from the Mirror as quickly as we can.

Liverpool handed Marc Guehi transfer update as fresh exit pathway emerges after deal collapse

The ‘Marc Guehi transfer update’ Liverpool have been handed is Louis Saha telling a bookmaker for money that maybe Manchester United should try and sign him.

Now look, we know everything is currently going wrong for Liverpool but we really don’t think things have yet reached the stage where they are gleaning their transfer updates from the opinions former footballers tell bookmakers for money.

Still, though, we’re quite intrigued about the emergence of a ‘fresh exit pathway’ for Guehi. As far as Mediawatch was aware, with Guehi in the last year of his current deal and not minded to sign a new one, there were two exit pathways – for a fee in January, or free next summer – and no real scope for the emergence of any fresh additional ones.

Hold on, though, because Louis ain’t finished.

‘It’s simple: if Man Utd can hijack the deal to Liverpool, even by paying £20million more than his market price, do it.’

There you have it. The fresh exit pathway? Simply a far more expensive version of the first exit pathway. It really is simple.

The sound of the Pulis

Just a strange headline from the Daily Mail here.

Tony Pulis football is BACK says Pep Guardiola as Manchester City boss claims Premier League’s set piece obsession is like playing Stoke City EVERY week

Firstly because while Guardiola does mention Sean Dyche and Sam Allardyce by name when discussing the set-piece goal being so hot right now, one manager he doesn’t mention is Tony Pulis.

‘Today set pieces are a threat. I remember a long time ago with Sean Dyche in Burnley. Burnley were an incredible threat in the long balls, second balls. Dyche is one of the best by far doing these kind of aspects.

‘It’s not new, he did it before. Or Sam Allardyce. Or I remember when I was not here, Stoke City. Do you remember Stoke City when they made the throws? Now it’s just more and more teams doing that but back then maybe Stoke was the exception.’

And notice that when Guardiola does mention Stoke, he says ‘more and more teams’ are doing it now. Does he say the Premier League is like playing Stoke every – or indeed EVERY – week? Obviously not, because that would be a mad thing to have said.

A weary Mediawatch must once again point out that words have meanings and really can’t just be capitalised and thrown in wherever you like.

Express delivery

Things are looking up for Manchester United after three straight wins, with a couple of their summer signings starting to look particularly exciting after a slow start.

Obviously, that won’t do, so here come the Daily Express to rain on the United parade with regard to one such summer signing.

Man Utd facing Bryan Mbeumo blow as forward set to miss multiple games

You do almost, grudgingly, have to admire the sheer chutzpah of waiting until just after Mbeumo scores two excellent goals in a fine victory to pretend that the existence of this winter’s Africa Cup of Nations represents new information. Or indeed that it affects only Mbeumo and Manchester United.

We look forward to a near-identical story popping up if and when Mo Salah emerges from his current funk with a couple of big goals to leave a resurgent Liverpool in need of some misery.

Cloud nine

There are few things Mediawatch enjoys more than the technically correct headline. We mean that sincerely. Sure, it’s despicable and deliberately misleading and reveals a staggering disregard for the actual readers, but there is also undeniably a skill to concocting a headline that is both wildly deceptive yet also technically accurate.

The Mirror – and the trick is inevitably repeated across the Reach network – have nailed the brief here.

Nine players could miss Liverpool vs Crystal Palace clash as Arne Slot makes late call

Read it carefully, because it’s important.

The headline and story lead clearly and heavily on Liverpool.

Liverpool take on Crystal Palace in the Carabao Cup this evening with a host of key players absent for manager Arne Slot as he looks to turn things around at Anfield

Nine players could miss this evening’s clash between Liverpool and Crystal Palace in the Carabao Cup fourth round. The Reds will be determined to return to winning ways when they take on Oliver Glasner’s side at Anfield.

Again, read it very carefully. Spot the crucial difference between what it’s actually saying and what it’s heavily encouraging you at this stage to think it’s saying. And then let’s start counting the missing Liverpool players.

Alisson Becker, Jeremie Frimpong and Giovanni Leoni have all been ruled out of Wednesday’s match due to injury. Ryan Gravenberch and Alexander Isak are also doubts after missing the 3-2 defeat to Brentford at the weekend due to ankle and groin issues, respectively.

That’s five.

Curtis Jones’ availability is uncertain after he requested to be substituted during the second half at the G-Tech Community Stadium. However, Hugo Ekitike will be available for selection, having already served his one-match suspension for a red card he received in the previous round.

And that’s six. And then… that’s it. No more missing players. Until after several more paragraphs rounding up the latest agonies of Liverpool’s massive crisis, we eventually get this.

As for Palace, Cheick Doucoure and Caleb Kporha remain sidelined. Chadi Riad is also unavailable for selection, though he’s expected to return to training in the coming days after an extended absence with a knee problem.

And there’s your nine. Nine players who could miss Liverpool vs Crystal Palace clash. Clever bastards.